Fun Friday question...

beth919

Long time lurker, relatively newbie poster...On my local radio station this morning, they were having a debate over whether or not to give gifts back when you break up with someone. The male DJ was in favor of keeping gifts, while the female DJ said to give all gifts back.I was just wondering what everyone on here thought. Happy Friday!!!

scoetto

I'm pretty sure you're supposed to give them back.

amberbride10

A couple is engaged and then breaks up after receiving presents?  Give them back.  Death?  Keep them.

lyndausvi

gifts from who for what??? Gifts from-to one another  - keep them. Gifts from other people for enagement/wedding that breaks up.  --- send them back.

crfische

Or are you talking about gifts that you give each other and then you break up?OR are you talking about getting gifts for showers and then you break up before the wedding?This is a stupid question. It's not well phrased.

scoetto

Yeah, you need to be more clear. If they are wedding/engagement gifts from other people, they get returned.

ffmaid

Give them back

beth919

OK, sorry...let me clarify. They were talking about how Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo broke up. She had apparently given him a $100,000 boat. He isn't giving it back and she isn't asking for it back. This is what started the DJs' discussion. So, the question is about gifts to each other throughout the relationship NOT gifts given as engagement/shower gifts. Sorry for the confusion!

Soon-to-be Mrs. Vogt

Then no, they shouldn't go back. Gifts are gifts regardless. It's not conditional "Here's this boat...you can have it for as long as we're together. As soon as we break up though, it's MINE!"

ac_in_dc

Now if it's something you borrowed, that's different. Do you remember the ben folds song? Give me my money back you b!tch, And don't forget to give me back my black t-shirt.

crfische

Oh gifts to each other, you keep. I find that in relationships people only give them back as a sign of passive aggressiveness.

Lyss5782

Because Im secretly a 75-year-old retired lady, I know that Judge Judy would say you can keep regular gifts, but engagement rings are supposed to go back.  I think I would tend to agree with that.

crfische

Actually, the ring thing depends on the state. True story.

tomkat2010

IMO, whether you keep the engagement ring or not depends on who breaks it off - if the girl ends it she should give it back but if the guy breaks it off, she should keep it, pawn it, whatever.

salt78

Dammit I came in here expecting a fun question. Talk about a let down.

crfische

Yeah well, your opinion doesn't really matter when it comes to the law.  

pumpkinpumpkin

Etiquette is - if he gives you a gift for an occassion in which a gift is normally given (ie - birthday, anniversary, christmas), then the recipient isn't expected to return said gift. If it is given "just because" then it would be assumed that the gift should be returned. The same goes for your e-ring. If you got it for Xmas, then if it ever came to a fight, you wouldn't be expected to return it.

tomkat2010

fische - I wasn't suggesting I thought my opinion should override the law - I actually typed that before you posted about there being a law for such a thing. It was just an opinion.