Sudden Death of Jr Bridesmaid

zippityb

Because this is a message board?

jaimebeth9

Just seems pretty cold to me.

lins7883

I am so sorry for your loss and her family's loss.FI's grandmother passed away 2 weeks ago...and we're getting married October 10th of this year.  We really didn't want to do anything specific or bring up sad thoughts so we are doing something very subtle.  We were having a memory candle anyways...with no specific names or mentions made, just to signify those who could not be there with us.  So I bought a glass hurricane for the candle to go inside and etched a rose on to the front of the glass.  You can barely see it unless you are right up close, but that was his grandmother's favorite flower, and at the funeral everyone had red roses.  We aren't making any mention of the etching itself...it's more so to let her know we are thinking about her, and for us more than anyone else.Hope that helps.

zippityb

Sorry, OP if my inquiry offended you.

ffmaid

Also if truly in honor of her her parents might want to also dance that song. Also unless you are a great lindyhopper a fast swing song that has a huge sad emotional component to it wikll be very very hard to dance. Let others dance at teh same time so that if you stumble and can not do so it will be less noticeable. FYI I have competed at lindyhop and if I had lost a child I cared about and this was a tribute to her I could not do a whole dance.

cdeshane

Because this is a message board? That's doesn't mean it is cool to question the relationship and closeness she has to this little girl.

BecW2be

This post made me cry. I'm so very sorry. I vote program, locket and perhaps you can dance to the song some time in the night without it being mentioned. But if it's going to affect you, then don't do it. She would not want you remembering her to that extent if you are going to be upset on your wedding day.

NicoleSahara

This made me tear up and I don't even know the girl, so I think the song would be too hard for people that do know her. I would ask her parents, though, and see what they think. I am so sorry.

ac_in_dc

I'm very sorry for your loss. I'd make sure that her parents are OK with whatever you decide, and save the dance decision for right before the wedding...see how everyone's feeling then.

shannonalise

That's really terrible. I'm so sorry! I hate when I hear stories about children being involved in tragedies like this. I think the locket idea is subtle and very thoughtful. I agree with the PP who say that the song might be too much. Very sweet of you to think about how best to honor her like this.

ktjanesmom

Im not sure HOW you should honor her, I only know that you should honor her.   But I do believe for everyones sake, including your own, it should be very subtle.  Dont you think if you and your husband dance to that song, its going to make you cry, possibly very hard?   No one wants that dear.

dixiechicken

I don't think it was too harsh. I think it is strange to call an non-related 8 year old a best friend.but who's to judge the loss someone feels from such a tragedy?...because it's a message board...see this is where I think people get confused. just because it's a message board doesn't give people the right to judge and offend.