Aisle Walking

shadyyyc

I am looking for a way to NOT walk down the aisle!! My father recently passed away and I think it will be toooo hard to walk down the aisle without him.  It is a sunday morning affair - in a temple- and I am desperate for ideas where I do not have to walk down the aisle.. but can still have a nice ceremony.. ANY SUGGESTIONS ARE APPRECIATED!!

slbriz34

You should really with your rabbi and come up with some workable solutions.  Unless you are already under the chuppah when folks are seated or come down a side entrance, I don't know how you can avoid walking down the aisle.If you don't want it to be a big deal, you can just walk in a normal fashion when it's your turn - and walk almost immediately after or with your bridal party.  You can also have the rabbi announce to folks before time for everyone to remain seated so that it's not so imposing walking down (I am having the rabbi do that and also put in in my program since for most Jewish weddings it shouldn't be done and I just don't want folks standing anyway).Good luck, hope this helped a little.

dnagal

Could you enter from the front side?Could you walk half way on your own and have your FI walk half way up and meet you and escort you to the front?  Or enter together?

soon2beweincraft!

I think walking in with your FI is a nice idea...or walking in with your mom... that is nice too. that is what I did since my father passed away years ago and I wouldn't have had it any other way

stina93446

I went to a wedding wherethe bride and groom just showed up at the front together. And all their family members were standing behind them. I liked it.I also went to a wedding 2 weeks ago where the groom and groomsmen just showed up. You could do it that way.

brookeanderik

Sorry for your loss.  :(My opinion is that you are going to be emotional either way because there is no way that you are going to avoid thinking about your dad.  If I were you (although I can't imagine how sad it would be to lose my father so close to the wedding), I would have my mom walk me down the aisle and try as hard as I could to focus on how much he loved you, how much your mother loves you, and how much your soon-to-be husband loves you.You'll be surprised at your emotion when you walk down the aisle.  I've heard of girls who KNEW they were going to cry and didn't and those who never cry and cried through the entire wedding.  It's ok to be emotional, I almost broke into sobs on my way down the aisle just from the overwhelming love and excitement that I felt.  I've been to so many weddings where both the bride and the groom cried (and I couldn't help but cry too).  Just make sure that your makeup artist gives you water-proof makeup. 

shadyyyc

Hi Stina!! Can you tell me more about how the bride and groom just showed up. It really sounds interesting and like a good Idea. I would love to know more.. please help!!   thanks sooo much

joebeth22

I'm so sorry for your loss.  It's been years since I lost my dad, and not a day goes by... As for the walk down the aisle -- consider this: girls, why are we being "given away" anyhow? Aren't we "launched" by now, or shouldn't we be? Haven't our parents, but mostly us, already done the work of separating, so that we are now ready to approach our man and our new lives together on our OWN two feet.  No one has to hand me off to my fiance; I'm ready to do that for myself, and yes, we've having the traditional ceremony, except that it won't be in a church or temple.  But Pachelbel's cannon will play, my aisle will be long and beautiful, and so forth.  I remember an episode of The Nanny, where Ms. Fein (hehe) walked herself down the aisle and Mr. what-was-his-name was standing there beaming and waiting for her.  It was priceless! Something to think about anyhow.  Having said all this, I may be too emotional, too shaky to pull this off and may need my brother (he's a dead ringer for Tom Cruise!) to take my arm and have my back (hehe).  Good luck.

brookeanderik

joebeth - I don't think a bride needs to walk down the aisle with anyone else.  I've been to many weddings where the bride walked alone.I was a little more "traditional" at my wedding, but I wasn't "given away" by anyone.  My fiance walked down the aisle with his mom on one side and his dad on the other (to the classical rendition of the Beach Boys' "God Only Knows"), then I walked down with both of my parents also (to the classical version of Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'").  My mother-in-law insisted on walking him down because of family tradition (Jewish) and I wanted my mother to walk down with me too, because I'm very close to my mother.

metalkp

Hi Shady. I am in the exact same boat as you...my dad died recently. It was also very sudden, so it's still fresh in everyone's minds and I do not want to draw a lot of attention to those father traditions. I personally felt that walking down the aisle alone would do that and make me and other people get upset. My original plan was to just have no aisle walk and have both my fiance and myself standing up there as the ceremony starts (as the groom usually is). But my mom really wanted to walk me down the aisle, so I agreed since it was important to her. I still feel a little weird about it since it does seem like it's drawing attention to the missing father, but I think that it will be ok and end up very nice as long as she doesn't cry. I also think walking down the aisle together with your fiance is a great idea. I am also struggling with other ways to include my dad in the wedding without being morbid or depressing people.  Good luck and sorry for your loss.

shadyyyc

Hi Metalkp, I am soo sorry for your loss. I completley understand what u are going through.  I admire you for trying to walk down the aisle. I just dont think i can do it!! You are very brave!!! If I can figure out a way to pull this off I will let you know!!Thanks again!