My Sister

scoetto

Apparently she isn't coming to the festivities b/c she doesn't want to deal w/my divorced parents being in the same room (They're both remarried and have been seperated/divorced for 8+ years). And she's also pissed that even though she eloped recently, all anybody is talking about is my vow renewal/reception. I texted her about not coming and she got all pissy saying she is done with my mom. Really? She's 32. WTF?

ffmaid

I think it is time for forget communicating my text and instead actually get together and chat over coffee or something.  

ffmaid

oh and your sig the 10 pushing up daisies implies that 10 have died since your sent you invites. Assuming taht is not true I would change the phrase  

scoetto

I would love to, ffmaid! She's on the opposite coast from me and never picks up her phone.

salt78

Well that's definitely the most immature thing I've heard today so far. I agree with ffmaid. Maybe it will be easier to deal with something like this in person. She needs to grow up.

TheSaltyPeanut

oh ug... I have family issues too. Mom and Dad got divorced after being married for 25 years. Mom just got remarried about 9 months ago. She just informed me that she kicked him out. Like seriously kicked him out (loaded all of his things in a uhaul and unloaded them at the farm. The reason? He drinks a lot. AND... you didn't know this when you married him? You really couldn't wait until after the wedding this weekend? Really? I might sound like a bridezilla but I don't care.

ffmaid

Ugh then can you text her a time for the two of you to do a video chat or something or at least phone call. I get she is being a hassle . Yes she is probably sad that people care more about weddings they are invited to then elopements. This is something we see here all the time with brides that eloped. However sounds like some other stuff going on

scoetto

I do think there is something else going on. She won't talk to me about it. Or anyone else really for that matter. It sucks. I really wanted her to be there. 

vallyhoo

So if I understand correctly, your parents are fine with being in the same place, but your sister isn't? And is there any other reason why she would be 'done with' your mom?Sorry you've dealing with this, family drama is not fun at all. Good luck though.

BecW2be

"Well, that's really sad. I can't believe you can't put aside your differences for a few hours, but I understand your feelings. I'll miss you." She'll be the one regretting it, not you. She needs a great big glass of Grow the Hell UP.

ffmaid

I agree with Bec she needs a glass of grow the hell up but I also see it being a sad thing for you if she skips. Could you contact her new husband does he pick up the phone? What does he think is going on?

scoetto

Vallyhoo, you are correct. Both of my parents are sucking it up for the weekend. They might not be ok with it but they will pretend which is fine by me. Bec, yes she does need to grow up. I wish I knew what the other issues are. My mom can be a handful (super passive agressive) but I've learned to deal with it over the years. My sister hasn't really had to deal with much of anything family related because she lives on the West coast. My parents and I are on the East coast, but I'm 3 hrs away from them and visit frequently.

scoetto

I honestly don't know what her husband thinks. You're right, ffmaid, I should contact him and see what's up. I know it's not travel related - they travel everywhere all the time, including an overseas trip at the beginning of Oct - a few weeks before the ceremony.

vallyhoo

Oh man, well I hope that she comes around, after all your parents are, so she can as well. Plus I can understand feeling a pang of jealousy... but... that was her choice no one forced her into eloping (hopefully).

ffmaid

One thing that helped on a family estrangement in my family was I promised a family member I would if he prefered sit him and his wife instread of with his parents where he would normally fit but instead with my college pals. Would it help if you promise her she will not be seated near your parents and instead with some of your other pals she and husband might get along with?

scoetto

Possibly, ffmaid. I'm going to have to talk to her about it  more, if she'll pick up the phone.

mandysmear

My brother didn't come to my wedding because when I go to my hometown I don't stay at his house on his couch.  I stay at my "mama's" house where I have my own queen size bed and bathroom.  Siblings suck!  PS.  My brother came around... 3 or 4 months after my wedding when his dad died.

scoetto

Mandy, are you serious? That's lame. Ugh. Siblings do suck.