**Missy**

bbyckes

I saw in Nugget's post you had gastric bypass surgery and lost 200lbs.  Can you tell me about your decision to have surgery and your weight loss experience over the past couple years?  What complications arose and how has your body adjusted?That is an amazing feat regardless of how the weight came off.TIA

missy68

Sure... I had gotten up into the mid 300's.  This is in a nutshell... I've been heavy all my life. Chubby as a kid, began getting fat at puberty.  I got married in 2001 the first time, gained 80 pounds afterwards. My aunt had the surgery in 2003, did pretty well with it, and one day my mom said to me "I don't want to bury you." So, I started checking into it. I found a great surgeon, discovered my insurance would cover it (between my weight and the comorbidities I had - pre-diabetes, high blood pressure, etc), and I had it in June of 2004. I separated from my now ex in the fall of 2005, and had lost about 160 pounds and lost the other 40 in the year-18 months following (some due to stress, that's when my mom told me I didn't look healthy - I lose it first in my face).  J has only known me this weight.  I've put on 15-20 pounds since we've been together, but I've also lost inches in the waist and hips, owing to the biking we've been doing. Overall, I'm more active and healthier.I am NOT a stress eater.  I can't eat when I'm stressed.  J has to watch that for me.  The only real complication I've had has been some back issues and a stomach that is sensitive.  Because of the not eating when stressed, acid will back up into my pouch, and sort of fester.  I take omeprazole daily to combat this. I also always carry some sort of snack with me, and eat something (even if it's a carb snack) about every 2-3 hours.  I order regular food in restaurants, but eat about a 1/3 of it, sometimes a 1/2 if its really good and I only eat one of the items. I just box it up and take it home.  Order off the appetizer menu a lot for dinner.I could use some plastics on my arms and boobs and lower body (especially), but I am on the fence about that. I can send you a before/after collage if you're interested. send me an email at love_emmie05 at yahoo.And yes, I am a different person than I was 180/200 lbs ago.  Core is the same, but different. Thanks for asking!

bbyckes

Missy, YGM!  Thanks for the offer of the collage.I don't want to get too personal, but maybe your battle can help others.Do you think genetically you were pre-disposed to be heavier?  I know you mentioned your aunt, what about other members of your family?Did you exercise or was it all just eating less that attributed to your weight loss?  Are you concerned about the weight that you've gained with J?  How are you different?  Other than body, what has changed for you mentally?  Do you consider yourself skinny?  Is it like recovering addicts, where you always consider yourself fat, but in reality you're not?I know these q's may be better served on the GIS board, but I'm asking anyway.

missy68

I am probably genetically predisposed to it, but I am sure much of it was what and how I ate as a child (and an adult). While both parents are overweight as adults, they weren't as youth/young adults. My father's family is very trim. My mother's family has obesity and diabetes rampant.  My weight loss post-op was vastly caloric consumption, but there was an increase in activity level.  Not tradtional exercise, but I was more active. I mowed the grass, walked around more shopping, etc.  Before, I had gotten to a point where it was getting painful (knees) to walk - I didn't do a lot, and didn't want to be in public. I didn't fit in the rides at the amusement parks. THAT was my big humiliation - having to get off a ride because it wouldn't fasten.  The more I lost, the more I did, and the more I wanted to do.I was really concerned at first about the weight gain, but it appears to be stable, which tells me my body is happy.  Also, last winter was my first winter here, and Iowa is HARSH in the winter. I think I was like a bear, hibernating, LOL. Seriously, though, I've lost a little bit of it.  I'll never be where the weight charts say I should be, not unless I do the plastics.  And I'm okay with that. I'm embarrassed by the cottage cheese thighs (I wear long shorts and skirts that come to my knees), but I can deal with the rest, because I know what it was before.It took me a long time to get past the "fat chick" mentality. I was never happy with myself, never had self-confidence, let others treat me like dirt, the whole 9 yards. I was so happy someone wanted to marry me when I got married the 1st time, I never questioned whether he was truly right for me or not.  I lost my core self in that marriage. Post surgery, I found me again. That's why I'm a 2nd time bride. I see the difference now.  I didn't become a supermodel, but I was able to grow the confidence I needed to be on my own and not need to be loved by a man.... does that make sense?There are still days where I am down on myself and days when my confidence falters. I admire those whose confidence shines.  I'm happy to share what I can. I'm proud of it. It wasn't easy. Well, it was and it wasn't - I don't know how to explain that. There were real consequences if I overate. There still are.  I'm much more aware of portion sizes, but I can enjoy most any kind of food.

bbyckes

It may sound corny - but I'm genuine when I say, "Thank you for sharing your story."  It is such a taboo to talk openly about weight and our struggle with it.  It really is inspiring to know that someone who came out the other side. I can't wait to see your collage!