Wedding Etiquette Forum

Gifts from non-attendees

I had always been under the impression that I had to send a "real", relatively expensive (i.e., non-token) gift when I was invited to a wedding, even if I didn't attend.  However, I was surprised that of the many people who were unable to make our wedding, we received gifts or cards from only a handful of them, all of these really being token gifts. I'm not complaining -- we really didn't need the gifts we got. It just made me wonder if this means that I don't need to send gifts when I don't attend weddings?  It gets expensive, you know?

Re: Gifts from non-attendees

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    If I'm invited to a wedding, it's generally because I really like the person, and I want to give them a gift, so I do whether I'm going to the wedding or not. It's all about what kind of person you want to be.
    Our Story MAJORLY UPDATED 8/6/09
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    You are never ever obligated to send a gift no matter if you attend or do not attend. Sending a gift is something that is done based upon your budget and your affection for the couple. Those that do not attend are likely not attending either due to budget , or lack orf closeness to you either would account for not considering getting you a gift. also you have a year after someones wedding to get them a wedding gift and I think yours was just a few weeks ago.
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    Thanks for the info.  We have a lot of "good acquaintances" whose weddings we are invited to and who we invited to ours.  I would like to go to their weddings when possible, but they're not such close friends that I feel guilty when I can't attend.  This is the category of people that I was buying expensive gifts for (since I would definitely buy expensive gifts if I attended).  Now I'm realizing that the gift rule isn't so strict, so that's good to know.Thanks!
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