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Father Daughter?

My father and I have not been close for SEVERAL years.  He and I were two peas in a pod back when I was five, but once I started to grow up and have opinions and questions it pretty much marked the end of our relationship.  I have made several attempts to maintain/reestablish a dialog.  He tells me how important it is then will put forth zero effort back.  It's been something that I've learned to deal with over the years but now that I'm engaged, it's become a whole new issue.  He's made it clear that "the bride's father has a very small part in the wedding, but he want's it".  This has put me in a terribly awkward situation as I would much rather have my mother walk me down the isle.  I would also much rather have my step father dance with me for the father/daughter dance.  I don't want to cause any more bad blood between my parent's already tenuous relationship so I honestly don't know what to do.  With all of the weddings I've been to it makes me stress even more when I see the bride and her father getting along wonderfully and enjoying themselves.  Do I just concede and give him his moments in the spotlight?  Or should I take a stand for what I really what and what would have more meaning for me?

Re: Father Daughter?

  • A good option for you would be to have both your mom and bio dad walk you down the isle and give you away. I also second what PPs have said about bio dad cutting in half-way through the dance. I understand that you want him in your life, and I really think you should sit him down and tell him that. Explain to him why he wasn't your first thought for giving you away and for the father/daughter dance. He may be stuck because he's not sure how to go about being in your life. Give him some examples of what you can do together. Good luck!
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