Wedding Etiquette Forum
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Would this be odd?

I'm not a fan of the traditional head table (being on display, not sitting WP members with their s/o's). However, they're very common here (I was told by a vendor that it's the centerpiece of the reception. Puke.)We considered a sweetheart table, but really want to eat with some of our WP. We considered sitting with just our siblings or just our MOHs/BM and their s/o's. Either of those options would leave out someone we wanted to sit near. So, I thought we would do one long table (well, 3 long tables), and sit people on both sides of them. It would be part of the rest of the seating (so not separate like a head table). And if I'm counting correctly, we would sit about 22 people around it on both sides. We would also have a children's table next to the table for WP members' children and the FG & RB. My MOH is insistent that that's completely weird and no one will be able to see us and take pictures. I really don't care.If you saw a set-up like this at a reception, would you think it was odd?
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Re: Would this be odd?

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    I think it's fine.  You're not all going to be seated for very long anyway.  Personally, I'd hate to have pictures of me while I'm eating.  Talk about unflattering.
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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    That's what we are doing, it is called a kings table or a captains table, I am excited for it and think it is a better alternative to the typical head table where everyone is in a straight line, it also works for us since a lot of our BP doesn't  have SOs and didn't care to bring anyone
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    People take pictures of brides & grooms eating?  That is odd in my opinion.  I would feel like an animal at the zoo.I don't think your arrangement is odd.  I've actually never been to a wedding with a head table.  We're a long way off from deciding seating arrangements, but I assume we'll just sit at a regular table with our sisters and closest friends (and their significant others).
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    We had 17 people (WP + SO's) sit on all sides of a long rectangular table. It was in the head table postition of sorts and the rest of the guest tables were round. It worked out great! It's not traditional but it is the way you would eat under any other circumstance.
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    bel: Now I kind of wish we were having a head table, so we could stage a Last Supper picture.  FI would find it exceptionally amusing.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    Fang, people too tons of pictures of Tim and I eating and then they e-mailed them to us. Those pictures are def. frame worthy.
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    I think it's fine.  Here is my table at the wedding and who we sat with.  While people at first thought it was weird.  If you met my DH would would know it fits us prefect.  The deal with kids was they had to sit through 'serious' pictures then we would do a funny one.






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    It is a big reception, yes. From how I understand that it would be set up, it would be at the top of the dance floor, with our honor tables set up near us (so parents, grandparents, aunts/uncles, etc.) Then we would leave room for the dance floor and have tables around it and then spreading to the back of the room. Dani - we considered the MOHs/BM too, but I have two MOH's, and FI has one BM (his brother). It would cause family drama if his sister couldn't sit at the head table with FI but his brother could. And my brother would feel left out if all the other siblings were with us, but not him. Then if we did just siblings, my MOHs wouldn't sit with us. If we did just family (my one MOH is a cousin), then my other MOH would be left out. If we tried to include everyone, we'd have most of our wedding party anyway, so we might as well just include everyone :)
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    I get nervous about long tables b/c I think it may be tough to move around/socialize, etc. But I'm sure it will look good, so don't let that scare you off. FWIW we did a sweetheart and it worked out really well b/c we didn't have to deal with the politics of who we would sit with. In a 4 hour reception we spent maybe 20-25 minutes there ?? I eat fast...but it was actually nice to get a break from socializing at sit together (just the 2 of us) for those 2 courses. I'm sure whatever you decide will look good...sounds like you're on the right track.
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    This sounds overly complicated. We did a sweetheart table and let the BP sit wherever they wanted. I'm glad because it was about the only time H and I weren't socializing and we had a little time together, plus, like Dani said, we were hardly there at all anyways.
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    The sweetheart table is last on my list of options. I completely understand why people do it, it's just not my personal preference.As Sarah said, people do take pictures of you while eating (at least they do in my crowd) and I hate HATE hate having people watch me eat. I feel like the spotlight would be on us for the few minutes we do get to sit down and eat, and I want to be sure if I have time to eat, that I'm not too nervous to actually get a few bites in.
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    Yes it is odd. You will barely sit and eat being off being social most of the time so it is not like you will atcually be sitting with anyone .
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    I'm having this same problem.  We wanted to do a big round table in the middle of the room, but the venue only has tables that will seat 8.  So I think we're going to do the same thing you are with the long table on both sides.  With BP and guests, and us we'll be at 16 people.  So we'll do something like 7 on each side and 1 at the head of each.
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    I mentioned to my WP that I was going to do a sweetheart table and mutiny ensued.  My WP actually WANTS to sit up at a table on a riser, without their SOs, being gawked at during dinner.  They like the idea and can't understand why someone wouldn't.  *sigh*  Welcome to South Dakota. We're still stuck in the 1950's apparently.
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    I guess I don't think it's weird, I just really can't picture it. I guess I don't quite get it. I really liked our solution, which was to have a sweetheart table, but with round tables immediately on each side of us.  I still wanted to be able to talk to people too, so this worked out well.  And everyone could still see us clearly.
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    Personally, I think as long as you're not putting people in other rooms or creating a situation where it looks like (or people feel like) they're stuck at a kiddie table or a "you suck, be happy I let you have a meal" table, then it's all good. I went to a reception that was held at a Victorian house once, and the tables were all over the house. We were at a table in some little room and couldn't see into many other rooms. We had no idea where the food was, we never saw the cake, apparently there were toasts, but we had no idea what was going on or where or when. We never did get any food. Thank God there was a Taco Bell on our way out of town or we would have starved.
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