Wedding Etiquette Forum

Children at weddings

Hey. I just recently got engaged after being with my fiance for 3 1/2 years and I havent even really started the wedding planning yet but I already have a problem. I was planning on having a formal night time reception so I didnt plan on inviting anyone under 18 years old but apparantly my fiance had no idea cause he brought up having his nieces and nephews at the wedding and we had a fight because I said I didnt plan on inviting children. He said thats the only thing hes asked for and its important to him. So the thing is Im not sure if I should just let him invite his 8 nieces and nephews who range in age from around 5 to 14 or if I should not even consider it. The problem is that it would cost more money for kids who probably wont even eat much and Im worried about them running around at the reception and ruining everything. I always thought children didnt get invited to a formal evening reception but he disagrees. So if anyone has any advice I would appreciate it. Thanks
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Re: Children at weddings

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    Calm down ladies...give the girl a break...I am only having kids 12 and up or ones that are in the wedding. We don't have a lot of kids in our families...FI only has two nieces and they are both in the wedding party. I feel like if it is family they should be invited. IF anyone other than family asks about it just say that you are only inviting kids that are in the family. We told our friends about the no kids thing and they were more than happy about it. It gave them a night off to relax and let loose. Also, my reception doesn't even start until 9 at night and so it is not very "kid friendly" to begin with. Good Luck!
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    The guest list needs to be something that you both agree to.  It's not just your wedding.You may not have meant it to come off that way but your post was filled with a lot of I, me, and my and not 'OUR'.
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    We have a similar issue in that all of my cousins are over the age of 21, and all of his cousins are well under the age of 21.  While I do not really want kids there, I could not, in good conscience, tell him that his cousins were not invited to our wedding, when all of mine could be there.  So, we decided that his first cousins will be the only kids there and I am more than fine with that.  After all, it is his wedding as well.
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    I just wanted to also throw out the suggestion that you could set a cut off time for children under a certain age to leave, say 9pm or so? You just let people know by word of mouth. That way you would both get what you want.
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    anna, give Just Engaged a break, darnit! ;)
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