Out of Town Guests

LAHwed2010

Hi Ladies, So, we just moved to our new city and are having our wedding here. All of our guests and wedding party will be coming in for our wedding from out of town. Most are fairly close, approx. a 60-90 mile drive. Since all of our guests are out of towners, what is the proper etiquette around this? We simply can't afford to buy breakfast for all our guests or have them all attend our rehearsal dinner. Also, do we have to attend breakfast with our guests the morning after? We would rather just sleep in and have a private breakfast on the balcony of the suite we are getting for the night. Please help! I don't want to do anything that is rude to my guests, but I also don't want us to go broke in the process.

mwhitson14

I would say you don't have to do anything with those guests. That's not that far of a drive, so I bet most of them won't even stay in a hotel, I wouldn't unless I thought I'd be drinking.

tidetravel

You are under no obligation to host OOT guests. They understand the costs of traveling for a wedding. I would, however, make an effort to invite them to the RD if they plan on arriving early. That may mean that you have to find a less expensive option for the RD than you are currently planning.

jennyp08

I don't think you have any obligations to the out of town guests.  My friend was in a similar situation this past summer.  She didn't have any sort of even for all of them, etc, and I didn't expect her to.  I think that the breakfast the next day is your call.  If it were a destination wedding, it would make sense.  Personally, I may end up doing it since I will be at a Bed & Breakfast along with a few guests.  However, more traditional receptions don't make it seem necessary, and I wouldn't break the bank on something like that if it doesn't fit your event or its not what you want.

EmmaBride2B

I wouldn't consider 60 miles a long way to drive for a wedding. I probably would just drive home after, in fact, unless it was a really close friend and both DH and I planned on drinking. So, no I don't think you have to plan a breakfast or invite everyone to the RD. I don't know when it became normal to invite oot guests to the RD anyway, I hadn't heard of it until my mil decided to invite everyone. So don't go broke, it's nice that you're trying to be considerate though.

Catwoman708

You are not required to invite the OOT guests to the RD, or a morning after breakfast, or even buy them breakfast. Some people do, but it's not mandatory or expected. Morning after breakfasts or brunches are not done everywhere. But what you can do is find a couple of local hotels and try to arrange for a discount for your guests. Preferably hotels that either have a free breakfast, or that are very close to restaurants.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

I've never heard of having a breakfast for OOT guests. You don't HAVE to invite them to the rehersal dinner, either. Maybe plan to meet for cocktails at a local restaurant or someone's house after the RD if you're feeling particularly nice, or leave "welcome" bags or boxes at their hotels.

TheSaltyPeanut

If you want to do something nice for the OOT guests that do actually stay in a hotel, maybe you could put together a little oot box for them? It wouldn't cost too much and you could include a list of some things to do in the area. PIB if you need some inspiration!

LAHwed2010

Thanks ladies!! That helps a bunch!! I was getting worried for a minute that we might have to spend a fortune on the brunch and RD. I would love to do OOT baskets at the hotels, however we can't get a block of rooms b/c we have a ton of guests who just might come in for a night and most hotels in LB are a 2 night minimum. All my guests are probably going to stay at different hotels, so I wouldn't even know where to leave the baskets at.