I got engaged in August and chose 4 bridesmaids right away. One being my cousin who lives close-by and is the same age as me. We've never been very close despite our close proximity and age. She's always been a bit quiet and I the opposite. In recent years before the engagement, we've gotten closer - chatting on the phone regularly, though I'm always the one who initiates. She's very kind and supportive of me and vise-versa. My cousin got engaged a few months after me in December. And I'm sure she hasn't made me a bridesmaid of hers. Though she had made reference prior to her engagement that I would be. I'm kinda of surprised she hasn't asked me but I'm okay with letting that go. My MOH lives in LA and is unable to plan a bridal shower for me, so she sent an email to all my bridesmaids regarding and NO ONE responded to her. A month later my MOH sent another email regarding a Bachelorette party and again NO ONE responded. Rude IMO. So I sent a nice msg to the girls saying basically that they should atleast acknowledge her msg so she knows that they've received it. My cousin responded to me saying "we're going to plan you an amazing shower not to worry!" And I thanked her and said that she can contact my mother and she will help. My parents are divorced and ALL of my family is on my dads side.
Anyways, I just had Easter brunch with my family (my dads side, my cousin/bridesmaid and my aunt and uncle (her parents). And at the end of the meal we started discussing when the family would get together again, and I said "oh and I'll have a bridal shower around then (around my grammas bday). And my uncle says "I wonder who you want to plan that for you!!" And my aunt says "ya dont you have other bridesmaids??!!" and my uncle says "don't you have other friends!!" and I said "yes" At this point I was totally caught off guard and didn't even know what to say. My aunt says "why aren't your other bridesmaids planning it?" I said "well they're not very organized..." I just didn't know what to say. And then my aunt says "oh you think H*******(my cousin) is?! haha" and my cousin looked quite uncomfortable at this point. I just left it and didn't say anymore and said goodbye and left the brunch. I feel like my cousin has complained that I've asked her to plan my shower like shouldn't I have closer friends for this? And I never asked her to plan my shower either. I feel like this also adds to the fact she hasn't asked me to be a BM. I have plenty of friends that have even asked my why I haven't included them in the wedding party but I felt like choosing my cousin is choosing someone who will always be in my life and a way for us to become closer! Family is important to me and I just feel totally attacked and stupid. I want to say something to my cousin but I'm not sure what or if I even should.
I would really appreciate some guidance and advice.