my big dilemma

sasha_araujo

thanks guys no more big dilemma

LeenieLane

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:ff29e43f-d457-41cc-b77a-f2a5cbb8abe5">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to my big dilemma : I have no idea what's going on here.
Posted by edielaura[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Holy Moly...me neither. Give them fake names. Brother = Jack, ex best friend = Sally, FSIL (?) = Jane. I'm not sure I even got that part right....

</div>

B&K10+13+12

What?

Simply Fated

I agree with pp, I need less pronouns.

achiduck

So your former best friend is engaged to your brother. And your FSIL was engaged to the same brother? And you want them both to be your BMS?

I'd call MUD but you've been on here since 2008. But why is this your first post?

LeenieLane

wait...I get it.

a) Your brother, Jack, is dating your ex best friend, Sally

b) Jack used to date your future sister in law, Jane

c) Jack and Jane were engaged at some point but called off the wedding

d) Since then, Jack and Sally hooked up, dating status unknown (?)

e) Jack got Sally pregnant

f) Sally stole your wedding venue, which you state is your (?) house? You and FI live there? Or is "your" house the house you and brother Jack grew up in?

g) Your FI's darling sister Jane is friends with your FI's ex, Veronica, out of spite of you being friends with Jack's baby mama? 

h) Jane is threatening to make your life a living hell and wedding day a disaster because she is bent you are civil with the mother of your unborn (i think....) niece/nephew? This part is foggy.......

It sounds like the drama starts with Jane and not Sally. You can't shaft Sally out of sharing in this day with you if you want her there. As for FI's other sisters, that is your call. Drama will only live and breed where you allow it to. If you nip it now, it won't spin out of control. If it goes beyond your control, let it go and know you did what you could and you just cannot control adults who cannot control themselves.

StephBeanWed61502

Whatever is going on here, I'm guessing the best advice for you is going to be as follows:

If you already asked someone to be in your bridal party, you are stuck with them unless they attempt to murder or sleep with you or your FI.

Stop bothering yourself with what other people are doing for their weddings - decide what to do about your own and ignore everyone else.

If you think someone is jealous or trying to compare your weddings or something, stop talking to them about your wedding.

You're welcome.

MyNameIsNot

I can't wrap my head around how someone can steal your venue if it is your house.  Your house, your rules.  Tell them no.  

LeenieLane

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:ff297ba4-20bd-469b-9076-7647bc009c3c">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]So your former best friend is engaged to your brother. And your FSIL was engaged to the same brother? And you want them both to be your BMS? I'd call MUD but you've been on here since 2008. But why is this your first post?
Posted by achiduck[/QUOTE]

<div>I'd hope if this were MUD, the punch line would have been way more exciting and the details would have been almost picture-perfect clear - as if it were a well thought out "story". Maybe she is a serial lurker and didn't have anything to add to TK until now?</div><div>
</div><div>It seems like someone typed up this post with true emotion; hense the rambling! </div><div>
</div><div>No offense, OP.</div>

acaponi87

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:39d5edd4-ac43-4c40-b295-5b4d8e36f248">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]I can't wrap my head around how someone can steal your venue if it is your house.  Your house, your rules.  Tell them no.  
Posted by MyNameIsNot[/QUOTE]

ME TOO!!

lyndausvi

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:3ffd9dd8-c840-41ef-bd7d-b1926ae6d22b">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]wait...I get it. a) Your brother, Jack, is dating your ex best friend, Sally b) Jack used to date your future sister in law, Jane c) Jack and Jane were engaged at some point but called off the wedding d) Since then, Jack and Sally hooked up, dating status unknown (?) e) Jack got Sally pregnant f) Sally stole your wedding venue, which you state is your (?) house? You and FI live there? Or is "your" house the house you and brother Jack grew up in? g) Your FI's darling sister Jane is friends with your FI's ex, Veronica, out of spite of you being friends with Jack's baby mama?  h) Jane is threatening to make your life a living hell and wedding day a disaster because she is bent you are civil with the mother of your unborn (i think....) niece/nephew? This part is foggy....... It sounds like the drama starts with Jane and not Sally. You can't shaft Sally out of sharing in this day with you if you want her there. As for FI's other sisters, that is your call. Drama will only live and breed where you allow it to. If you nip it now, it won't spin out of control. If it goes beyond your control, let it go and know you did what you could and you just cannot control adults who cannot control themselves.
Posted by LeenieLane[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Impressive.</div><div>
</div><div>It's hard to give advice to someone who is surrounded by drama.</div><div>
</div>

mkrupar

LOUD NOISES!

froggatt.clare

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:3ffd9dd8-c840-41ef-bd7d-b1926ae6d22b">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]wait...I get it. a) Your brother, Jack, is dating your ex best friend, Sally b) Jack used to date your future sister in law, Jane c) Jack and Jane were engaged at some point but called off the wedding d) Since then, Jack and Sally hooked up, dating status unknown (?) e) Jack got Sally pregnant f) Sally stole your wedding venue, which you state is your (?) house? You and FI live there? Or is "your" house the house you and brother Jack grew up in? g) Your FI's darling sister Jane is friends with your FI's ex, Veronica, out of spite of you being friends with Jack's baby mama?  h) Jane is threatening to make your life a living hell and wedding day a disaster because she is bent you are civil with the mother of your unborn (i think....) niece/nephew? This part is foggy....... It sounds like the drama starts with Jane and not Sally. You can't shaft Sally out of sharing in this day with you if you want her there. As for FI's other sisters, that is your call. Drama will only live and breed where you allow it to. If you nip it now, it won't spin out of control. If it goes beyond your control, let it go and know you did what you could and you just cannot control adults who cannot control themselves.
Posted by LeenieLane[/QUOTE]

That was impressive.  Are you a professional editor?

em01092

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:3ffd9dd8-c840-41ef-bd7d-b1926ae6d22b">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]wait...I get it. a) Your brother, Jack, is dating your ex best friend, Sally b) Jack used to date your future sister in law, Jane c) Jack and Jane were engaged at some point but called off the wedding d) Since then, Jack and Sally hooked up, dating status unknown (?) e) Jack got Sally pregnant f) Sally stole your wedding venue, which you state is your (?) house? You and FI live there? Or is "your" house the house you and brother Jack grew up in? g) Your FI's darling sister Jane is friends with your FI's ex, Veronica, out of spite of you being friends with Jack's baby mama?  h) Jane is threatening to make your life a living hell and wedding day a disaster because she is bent you are civil with the mother of your unborn (i think....) niece/nephew? This part is foggy....... It sounds like the drama starts with Jane and not Sally. You can't shaft Sally out of sharing in this day with you if you want her there. As for FI's other sisters, that is your call. Drama will only live and breed where you allow it to. If you nip it now, it won't spin out of control. If it goes beyond your control, let it go and know you did what you could and you just cannot control adults who cannot control themselves.
Posted by LeenieLane[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>*Applauds*</div><div>
</div><div>I was so confused. 

</div>

jessicabessica

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:39d5edd4-ac43-4c40-b295-5b4d8e36f248">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]I can't wrap my head around how someone can steal your venue if it is your house.  Your house, your rules.  Tell them no.  
Posted by MyNameIsNot[/QUOTE]

<div>But is her house also her brother's house, perhaps?</div>

Viczaesar

OP, you lost me at " she forces my brother to propose because she couldnt keep her legs closed (became pregnant)".  Based on that, I think you're a nasty human being.  

LeenieLane

Thanks! Still can't figure out for the life of me what the question is, though. She has an ex bff who is competitive, blah blah blah but will be the mother of her future niece/nephew and wants to take her venue....so also a FSIL. Then there is her FI's sister who is involving her (OP's) FI's ex in the drama? Short of the long is to invite them or not to invite them to be in the wedding or at the wedding. Either way, I'm confused. This sounds likes a big cluster you-know-what. 

OP, feel free to chime in. Inquiring minds would like to know what in the world you're talking about so we can help

NOLAbridealmost

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:238d6278-c090-476c-b931-7bcb741d7452">my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]my x best friend is so fake and always wants to compete..first she takes the venue i want (my house) and makes it hers <strong>second she forces my brother to propose because she couldnt keep her legs closed (became pregnant)</strong> and she compares her ring to mine it gets me so mad because this is after we made up shes still trying to be better than me..i asked to be my bridesmaid before when things were on good terms but once again they have turned bad next my fiances sister who was engaged to my brother is now trying to make my life a living hell because im okay with my x best friend..she brought over my fiances ex over to the house and then she tells me that she can ruin my wedding and make all her family not show up  ok so i dont know what to do because all of my fiances sisters are gonna be my bridesmaids except for the one above but i feel like im being rude because i have my x best friend in there or should i just not include any of the two? idk i need a solution i
Posted by sasha_araujo[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I'd love to hear the part about how your brother played no role at all in getting her pregnant.  </div><div>
</div><div>Grow up. 

</div>

LeenieLane

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:46619546-d867-481f-b7ae-9046097241ce">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to my big dilemma : I'd love to hear the part about how your brother played no role at all in getting her pregnant.   Grow up. 
Posted by NOLAbridealmost[/QUOTE]

<div>Very good point. </div>

StephBeanWed61502

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:46619546-d867-481f-b7ae-9046097241ce">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to my big dilemma : I'd love to hear the part about how your brother played no role at all in getting her pregnant.   Grow up. 
Posted by NOLAbridealmost[/QUOTE]

<div>NOLA, her legs were open <em>so wide</em> that he just fell in accidentally.  It happens on Maury ALL. THE. TIME.</div>

monkeysip

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:46e64bd6-5420-4e6b-8140-e9958dd24c56">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: my big dilemma : NOLA, her legs were open so wide  that he just fell in accidentally.  It happens on Maury ALL. THE. TIME.
Posted by StephBeanWed61502[/QUOTE]

<div>LOL... Of course I can't help but get a strange visual with this statement.</div>

Simply Fated

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:46e64bd6-5420-4e6b-8140-e9958dd24c56">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: my big dilemma : NOLA, her legs were open so wide  that he just fell in accidentally.  It happens on Maury ALL. THE. TIME.
Posted by StephBeanWed61502[/QUOTE]


tru fax

Meghannsix

Ugh, none of these people should be getting married, or procreating either.

toothpastechica

Wait was there ever actually a question? To include people you hate in your wedding party or not? I would think that would be an easy one. No...but I can't quite figure out if thats the question or not....

OliveOilsMom

Just run away and elope.  Problem solved.

LeenieLane

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:0a60b5bf-0378-4889-b3f5-bec79a54e99d">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]. See that up there? It's called a period. By itself it ends sentences and together with capital letters restores order to a block of text. I promise, just find the nearest first grader and ask if you don't believe me. If you place three of them together they join their super punctuation power to form an ellipsis, indicating an omission or trailing off. Two periods together are either scared and searching for their missing buddy or they are about to go their separate ways and end two distinct sentences.
Posted by MeganLindsay5685[/QUOTE]

This made me laugh so, so, so hard. If it weren't so long, I'd use it for my siggy. LOVE!

renegade gaucho

So, her diamond is bigger than yours, huh?

sasha_araujo

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:0a60b5bf-0378-4889-b3f5-bec79a54e99d">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]. See that up there? It's called a period. By itself it ends sentences and together with capital letters restores order to a block of text. I promise, just find the nearest first grader and ask if you don't believe me. If you place three of them together they join their super punctuation power to form an ellipsis, indicating an omission or trailing off. Two periods together are either scared and searching for their missing buddy or they are about to go their separate ways and end two distinct sentences.
Posted by MeganLindsay5685[/QUOTE]

Thank you teacher. I learned so much today. Thank God I do not have to write an english paper or I'd be in deep crap:)  Too bad they didn't let me use the "s" word...

sasha_araujo

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_big-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:28e05726-0050-479e-ac54-2d47f01535f2Post:b313ea8c-0b8f-42c9-b655-94b2b4739022">Re: my big dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: my big dilemma : I'd hope if this were MUD, the punch line would have been way more exciting and the details would have been almost picture-perfect clear - as if it were a well thought out "story". Maybe she is a serial lurker and didn't have anything to add to TK until now? It seems like someone typed up this post with true emotion; hense the rambling!  No offense, OP.
Posted by LeenieLane[/QUOTE]

None taken, it was rambling and I apologize. I only had 15 minutes to get to work and I wanted to share my story because I felt betrayed by both my best friend and my fiance's sister. It sucks when you get proposed to your best friend then decides she wants to get married too and I was in front of them when she said "I want a bigger ring than Sasha's" and when your fiance's sister tells me she wants to apologize for not talking to me and then she tells me that she can ruin my wedding and make her brother not love me. I honestly don't know what I did wrong to any of them. I feel like I don't want to invite any of them to my wedding but they're both part of the family. :( I don't want them to ruin my wedding, it's my day for crying out loud. Anyway, I found the solution to my problem but thank you guys anyways


As for me being on the knot since 2008 I was looking for a venue for my sweet 16 and no I'm not a serial lurker.