We got an RSVP back today from a family on FI's side, relatives of his dad. The invite was addressed to Mr. and Mrs Whomever and Family. Turns out that, unbeknownst to all of us except FFIL, the "And Family" meant their 2 year old son. The only reason we know this now is that they were kind enough to write the child's name and his age in parentheses, presumably so that we would not end up paying for a full adult meal for him.
Our wedding is a Saturday night, black tie. The ceremony time on the invite was 7 pm and the party is going to run until 1 am. Why it would occur to anyone to invite a 2 year old, much less actually bring a 2 year old, utterly escapes me.
Forget the whole wedding part of it - to me, you just don't bring teeny kids that age to any formal party, or seriously, anywhere that isn't childproof. My best friend has a child about that age and more often than not, she ends up wearing more of what her child eats than the child actually eats, and spends half the time chasing her kid around so she doesn't pull everything onto the floor or scream bloody murder if she's prevented from doing what she wants - two year olds are mobile, inquisitive, and stubborn! My best friend never once entertained the idea of bringing her child - she wants to wear a nice dress and a fancy necklace, wear her hair in a non-mommy hairstyle, drink a little, have adult conversations, and stay up as late as she wants. And not worry about her little one putting her hand in the candle centerpieces, yanking the tablecloth, yanking her necklace or hair or dress, crying during the ceremony, or generally being developmentally appropriate in an environment not safe or conducive to that developmental age.
These people are coming from out of town and I'm sure they don't want to leave their little guy with a babysitter for an extended period of time. But if we'd known about this before the invites went out, we could have made arrangements. It just didn't occur to FFIL that you shouldn't have teeny kids at late evening formal events, so he didn't mention to us that the child was little, and he didn't mention to the child's parents that they might want to make arrangements for his supervision.
My dad called FFIL and gently asked him if he'd speak to the family to a) make sure they really want to bring their little guy and b) request that if they do, one of them waits outside with him during the ceremony or finds a seat in the very back so that he can be taken out if, say, he starts yanking on the tulle lining the aisle or making a lot of noise or whatever else your average 2 year old might want to do. FFIL said OK, but was surprised that it would be an issue.
FI's reaction was, "I'm sure they won't ask US to babysit him" because, you know, the next logical step after bringing your teeny kid to someone else's wedding is to leave him with the bride and groom while you go hit the bar. Heh. FI does take after his dad every so often, I think.