So.. a little bit of backstory.
My FI and I are
super casual, laid back people. The extent of the tradition going into our wedding is that we're dressing up, and my parents are paying for it. It's going to be a sunset wedding in May, the guys are all wearing dressy-casual, I'm wearing a short dress, the reception is going to be at my folks house, the guest limit is 25 people (only about half of which are going to be attending the ceremony, the rest are coming for just the reception), our best friend is our officiate, and we're not doing a sit down dinner (but food and drinks will definitely be provided!). The FI family isn't even flying out for it...we're going to have a separate reception in his hometown in the summer.
We are absolutely thrilled to have a wedding like this. We're trying to keep it romantic, intimate, and fun. The idea of having more than about 40 people at our wedding gives us both hives, haha!
The problem is, having such a non-traditional wedding makes it a little bit hard to navigate traditional wedding etiquette. Which brings me to the main issue we're trying to work out.
My family has two close family friends (married), whom I have known since I was about eleven, and they have stepped in as a sort of distant grandparental role in my life. I would
love to have them present for the ceremony. However, we run into a bit of an issue with the reception (which, honestly, I've been to bigger birthday parties). Outside of my parents, the only people attending will all be between about 20 and 30 years old, and they are quite simply not the sort of crowd these family friends would be very relaxed around. The reception is also going to run from about 8:30 - 11pm, which is pretty late for them to be out, especially since it's an hour drive back to their house. It would not be at all awkward for me to have them present, but I worry it would quickly get uncomfortable for them. I know that traditionally, ceremony-only guests are considered rude, but is this situation an exception? What can we do to make them feel like we aren't just milking their time and gifts? Maybe a morning-before-wedding brunch that we pay for in their town?
Thanks in advance for any advice
