I am from the Midwest, my FI is from California. We are getting married in California, but do not want to exclude my family. So I was planning on throwing a party either about 1 to 3 months prior to the wedding or 1 month after the wedding.
My general idea for the party is having an open house where people can come and go as they wish, buffet style food, possibly a small cake and the radio playing in the background. I am not planning on wearing my wedding dress or doing any traditional reception dances, as the reception will be held in CA. I am also avoiding the term shower as I think that makes it sound like I want another gift as well as my wedding gift.
Which is more appropriate to have an Engagement Party before the wedding or a 2nd reception afterwards? Is it appropriate to include this invitation with the wedding invitation? Can I invite people to this party that I am not planning on inviting to the wedding?