My husband and I were married in 2003. We had already had a baby and my family was mortified by my being an unwed mother. My grandmother was helping us financially at the time (we had just turned 20 and didnt finish college) and said that she would cut us off if we didnt atleast get a marriage license. She said it would show we truly intended to get married. She gave us the money and we did it.
Three days later, she called me and asked me to come to her house. She also called my husband. When we arrived, she told us we would go through with "it" or she was done with us. We had no idea she had already called the pastor. We were married right then in her living room.
I cried. Not our of extreme happiness or overwhelming love for the man I was marrying. (although I absolutely adore him) I wanted a wedding, the dress, guests, the church, etc. She said we didnt deserve it. We didn't have a honeymoon because there was "no point".
We had intended to have a wedding ceremony for our friends to attend after that. Financially, it was impossible and my family did not support the idea.
It's taken nearly 9 years, but I can do it with out them. I want the wedding, the whole thing. But everything I am reading about renewal etiquette basically says I can't. I don't want to seem rude. I'm just disappointed that I missed that day that I dreamed of since I was a little girl.