Same/Similar ideas as your soon to be in-laws?

twihard08

If you didn't read my other post I have in-law issues. But I am working on being the bigger person...and my FI youngest sister was over this weekend and her and I talked about the wedding plans. Turns out her older sister, who is just barely 5 months older than me (and getting married just shy of a year before me) has similar ideas for her wedding as mine. Now I had no idea she and I had picked the same flowers until the youngest sister told me today after I told her which one I picked...And she is also thinking about doing a cupcake tower instead of an actual cake. Now I have decided on doing the cupcake tower, she isn't sure yet.

If she does use the same flower as me, and does do a cupcake tower is it okay for me to do it also.

tidetravel

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_samesimilar-ideas-soon-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3bb78e64-9dd3-4299-9c50-aaf37734c17dPost:2ade7f6e-5acd-498c-a1a4-c5b2e7efc1a0">Same/Similar ideas as your soon to be in-laws?</a>:
[QUOTE]If you didn't read my other post I have in-law issues. But I am working on being the bigger person...and my FI youngest sister was over this weekend and her and I talked about the wedding plans. Turns out her older sister, who is just barely 5 months older than me (and getting married just shy of a year before me) has similar ideas for her wedding as mine. Now I had no idea she and I had picked the same flowers until the youngest sister told me today after I told her which one I picked...And she is also thinking about doing a cupcake tower instead of an actual cake. Now I have decided on doing the cupcake tower, she isn't sure yet. If she does use the same flower as me, and does do a cupcake tower is it okay for me to do it also. :/
Posted by twihard08[/QUOTE]

Yes.  It's fine.  Your weddings are a year apart.  No one will notice, or care. 

DramaGeek

You have a REALLY long time until your wedding.  I'd put the plans on hold for a while and just enjoy being engaged.  Your taste and opinions - as well as what's trendy - may change.  I've heard too many horror stories of girls planning everything really early and then by the time their wedding rolls around they wish they'd done something different.

Right now I think you just need to relax and bask in being engaged.

sarah0725

Nobody is going to remember what flowers or cupcakes either of you served at your wedding. I think you're probably okay.

Also, take it from somebody who finally has less than nine months left on a three year engagement - you are WAY early to be sure what you're doing with flowers or desserts. My mind has changed about a million times about those things, and I still haven't decided entirely. I think I'm going to let FMIL handle the flowers.

brilibby4

Your wedding is about the same amount of time away as mine is.  Trust me when I say you need to hold off on the little details for awhile.  Fiance and I have been engaged since July and have only decided on our reception venue and (possibly) our colors.  I am on the knot all the time and am constantly finding new ideas that change my mind about what I think I want for our wedding! 

However, you are definitely allowed to use the same flowers and cupcakes as her.  I highly doubt she will care a year after her wedding and no one else will notice.  She does not own her wedding ideas and as long as you don't do everything exactly the same as she does, she should not care.

nda_roxybabe

Your sig. Too big....

twihard08

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_samesimilar-ideas-soon-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3bb78e64-9dd3-4299-9c50-aaf37734c17dPost:d066c094-fef3-4dee-b10a-c51e5d5685f4">Re: Same/Similar ideas as your soon to be in-laws?</a>:
[QUOTE]Your sig. Too big....
Posted by nda_roxybabe[/QUOTE]

Haha, I wasn't trying to do that. I was trying to get it to be my icon thing like it is now.
I am new to this site, so I didn't know how to do it at first! But I changed it!
=]
I love the saying under your pic sig! =]

Kate61487

I agree with PP's that you can definitely have the same flowers, dessert presentation, etc.  They won't actually end up being identical, and there's enough time inbetween you and your FSIL are probably the only ones who would notice.

BUT if it was important to you that your cupcake tower would be "cool and unique" or something like that obviously you may not want to repeat it.  If you decide you do want to be different then it's up to you to change your plan (not because her wedding's first, but because you're the one that wants to be different). 

NOLAbridealmost

I would say that unless your idea was incredibly unique, you're fine.

Cupcakes in lieu of cake is definitely something that has been done so your guests likely won't notice the repeat. 

The flowers....that's a little trickier.  If you're doing roses, peonies, gerber daisies, etc...it's completely fine that she's doing the same even if its the same color and style.

If you're doing something really odd on the other hand, like cactus, dogwood, or something really rare, then I'd be a little annoyed that she picked the same stuff.