Hello ladies,
Sorry this is long!
I have an issue on my hands and have for like 2 years regarding my fiancee and my brother in law. Two years ago at Christmas everyone was gathered at my parents' house, including myself, my fiancee, my sister and her husband. My sister's husband is quite a loud-mouth, and always tells stories that cannot possibly be true, like how one time he wrestled an alligator and won, stuff like that. That's just the way he is. He is very loud and you can always hear him from the other room. No big deal.
My sister's husband was in rare form that day, and that day he was telling my fiancee how he embezzled $200,000 from his company, how he had strippers galore before he met my sister, how he stole some furniture (we were in the other room and did not hear this until we heard the story later), all of these stories and my fiancee goes off on him yelling how he was a crook, a fat (enter bad word here), ect ect. My sister's husband then threatened him and told his he would beat him up. Needless to say, they are not fond of each other now.
Plus, at my other sister's wedding (this was before that Christmas), we were all seated at the same table, and my sister's fiancee asked if he could get his meal to-go, and the wait-staff said no, we don't have a box for that, and he told her, "I am going to throw this food on the floor if I don't get a box", and he got one. Btw he is 46, a little old for that stuff.
My fiancee and I got in a fight this morning regarding Thanksgiving. I told him my sister's husband will be at this year's Thanskgiving and my fiancee won't go now (they haven't seen each other since that incident). He tells me he resents my family sometimes because he thinks they choose my sister's husband over him, by having him there. He can't belive my father would allow such a "low character" in his house.
It all comes down to our wedding next year. I had to convince my fiancee to allow my sister's husband to even be invited. He finally gave in but said "he better not get out of line" That was before we got in the fight this morning. Even if my sister's husband does accept the wedding invitation and go, how am I going to keep them apart on the wedding day? I will be so afraid a fight will break out. Plus, my fiancee doesn't want him seated anywhere near his family.
It sucks because I'm stuck in the middle and I can't convince my fiancee to let bigones be bigones. It's been two years and even the mention of his name sends my fiancee into a rage. He said he has never hated anyone more than he hates him.
What should i do?? I basically have to invite my sister's husband (my sister is a bridesmaid), but I am so afraid they will fight. I know at the wedding there will be so much going on, they can avoid each other but the possibility is there. The only hope I have is he does not go (which might happen), but should I invite him, hoping he doesn't go? What if he does go? Even if they don't get in a physical fight, it will be akward because I will have to play referee.
This is the only real problem my fiancee and I have in our relationship, and I am afraid it will break us up one day because I feel like I have to choose my family or him.
