Registry Judging has me paranoid now...

jenluxsd

The post about how everyone judges registries pretty harshly has me concerned.

My fiance and I have been together a long time and own 2 homes together. We already have pretty much everything we need and we already have nice stuff in there.

But people tell us we need to register as well. I am worried that people will think I am "gift grabby" if I put the stuff I really want on there. My fiance and I buy pretty nice things for ourselves, so its not like we would be registering for stuff we would not otherwise buy.

But I also dont want people to feel as tho they can only buy us one ladle that was $70 if that was their price range for a gift.  

I have been also told that we can do charity registry if we already have everything we need, but then some say that is tacky too..

So what does a person do?

JessAndTrav

I'm sure that you could use a few upgrades...new towels, sheets, silverware, etc.

I say make at least one registry. People like having a guide of what to buy.

You can also include things like board games, cookbooks, DVDs/BluRays, etc on your registry.

Just make sure that you have gift prices ranges, starting at around $10ish.

Simply Fated

Well, you don't "need" a registry, despite what some people tell you. Those are just people who don't know what to buy you and want you to tell them straight out what to buy.

I think charity registries aren't really my style, especially if it's one charity I'm really against.

Don't worry about people judging you. Look at it this way, people are going to judge you  no matter what you do, anyway. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. People suck. I'm no different. I judge for someone registering for a hair straightener, but that doesn't mean it's right of me to judge.

If you keep your registry, just go with what people here usually suggest... get items on all price points and you should be fine. If your guests don't like any of those things, they'll think of something else, like a gift card or something from the heart. You can even mention gift cards on your registry.

I say go with your gut.

temerityjane

You have no idea what kind of stuff is out there that you TOTALLY NEED that you didn't even know you needed, and it makes it really easy to put together a small registry with a nice variety of not ridiculously priced and not way out there types of items.

For example, did you know you needed one of these? 

http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=274671&PseudoCat=se-xx-xx-xx.esn_results

Neither did I, until I saw a friend with one. Then I realized how empty my life is without it.

OR? OR?

http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=405954&PseudoCat=se-xx-xx-xx.esn_results

I mean, come on. If you're anything like me, you throw away a LOT of cilantro, AM I RIGHT?

No, but seriously. Think a little bit, but not TOO far outside the box, and you'll be able to come up with a lot of really reasonable "nice to haves" that will make you and your guests comfortable.

mags0607

I think a lot has to be said for also knowing your crowd, and knowing what kind of things that they would be comfortable buying. I have some more expensive stuff on my registry (even though I'm worried about having it on there.) but I know that I have a really big, really close family, and that some of them will be looking for larger ticket items.

lharri12

Make sure you have items with a wide range of prices.  If I were looking for a gift to buy you and the least expensive gift was a $70 ladle, I'd think you were expecting a lot of your guests.  I don't think you need to go as low as $10, but surely you can come up with some $20 or $30 items you'd like.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

I thought the same way as you. FI and I bought ourselves nice things when we moved into our current place - 600 thread count sheets, stainless steel cookwear, etc. Then I actually went to register and found TONS of stuff I still wanted. Hell, I have $3 napkin rings on my registry. Lots of things like wooden salad tongs, spoons, spatulas, a potato masher, a pastry cutter, a rolling pin. Things I haven't really needed thus far or that I've been too lazy to buy for myself. Plus, sheets and towels wear out. 

Just go register. I'm sure you'll find more than you think.

mica178

I love cooking, and currently, my cooking is limited by what tools I have in the kitchen.  While I certainly manage to stay fed right now, there's room for expansion.  It'd be nice to have more than one silicone spatula or to get rid of my Teflon frying pan and wok.  Or to toss all of my cloth potholders that have cooked in grease and old sauces (have you seen the silicone potholders at Williams Sonoma?).  It'll be nice to get rid of my college cookware and have stuff that I can use for the rest of my life (and associate with my happy day).

jenluxsd

The thing is I already have so many things already. Even small little knick knacks that one wouldn't think they have, like pastry cutters, rolling pins, a really nice tong set, like  sets of measuring cups and the like.

I even already have a gourmet espresso machine that I rarely touch.

I would register for sheets and towels, but I use a very specific kind from this local boutique and its not cheap.

Hmm...maybe I can register for stuff for the guest rooms. But would the likes of Calvin Klein/DKNY sheets and duvets covers still be too much?

We know our friends and families are from a wide variety of backrounds, but this registry thing has gotten me more stressed than the wedding itself

Knittibell

Register for what you want- find all sorts of items in all sorts of price ranges and DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT!!!

lisabill8

I'm in the same position as you, FI have a home and have lived together for over a year. We bought nice things when we moved in together, so we don't need to upgrade our things. We had a really hard time finding things to register for.  So, we have a very small registry. Registries are not a requirement, so don't stress yourself out over it. 

Bubbalub

I think you have received some great advice here. Register for stuff for your guest room (Calvin Klein/DKNY are not too expensive for a registry, it's what we registered for as well), register for decorative stuff, garden/patio items. Seasonal items like sports equipment for the summer.

What are your hobbies? I have seen registries at REI for things as small as D-rings for rock climbing. Do you draw or paint? Art supplies could be fun. Scrapbook? Read a lot? Knit? Sew? Do you go on picnics? Have pets?

I think that if your friends and family are hoping for a registry to at least give them ideas for things you and your FI want/need, then making a small one and seeing what happens is a good idea.

Don't worry about being judged. You know your crowd better than anyone.

parker624

Its OK to register for things like:

China
Crystal
New Everyday dishes
Gourmet Knives
Nice pots and pans
Vases
Artsy servewear (ie Michael Aram, Nambe, Beatriz Ball)
Bedding (its OK to register for the most expensive sheets!)
Towels
Silver or Stainless Steel cutlery
Picture frames

I think people turn their noses when you register for things not for BOTH of you, like:

Makeup
hair straighteners
dog stuff (this is debatable in my opinion)

Also, you need to evaluate what is typical in your family and friends circle to spend.  Do people only spend $50 or do they spend $100?  Do relatives want to chip in together to buy you something more expensive? You should have those things on your registry.

IMO, registering for measuring cups, strainers, ladles, spoons, etc. is OK but people will mostly just buy that stuff for your shower or not at all, and isn't as much of a gift as something you've wanted but would never buy yourself, like china or crystal or nice luggage.