NWR: Just curious!

CurlsNpearls12

Hi everyone! H and I have been together for 7 years in September, and just got married. We're both very excited to start our future together, but more excited to start a family. I was diagnosed with PCOS and Endometriosis a few months ago, and after talking with my doctor, and doing a lot of reading online, now or soon would be the best time for TTC, due to high infertility rates.

Right now, we're just taking it all in and enjoying married life, but have been talking a lot about having children soon.

I'm just curious what everyone's views were on starting a family right after your weddings. When are you TTC? Do you have a plan? Are you waiting for sometime down the road, or confused like me?

StephBeanWed61502

We just got married on Saturday! Yay! And right now, we're planning on waiting a few years to start TTC. However, we have talked about the possibility of fertility issues and have decided that we would definitely start TTC sooner if my/his health put us in a "now or never" situation. So I guess what I am saying is, although kids obviously change your life completely, and it can be a little overwhelming to have them right away after marriage, if I find myself in your shoes we would likely want to try for kids ASAP too. Good luck!

Avion22

We got married in April and just started TTC.  He's 33 and I'm 31, so we're not getting any younger....and we're financially stable and set in our careers, so it's a pretty good time.   

If the time is right, then there's no reason to wait.  

AdeleDazeem

Congrats, Steph!

My husband and I married at 30.  We said we'd start the kid train at 33.  That's next year - eek!

Carson386

First, congrats! Second, I also have PCOS. When I was first diagnosed, they told me I only had a few years to have a child. I was diagnosed 2 years ago and see a specialist every 6 months for tests. So far, they keep saying a few more years, but nothing in my case has really changed. I'm not trying to tell you it's not a big deal or that you will definitely be able to have kids later in life, I have no idea how bad your case is, mine isn't horrible. My best advice to you is to talk to your husband. Try to figure out the pros and cons of  TTC now versus waiting until later. If you both want children now, then go for it. FI and I want kids right after we are married, so we will start trying then. Other couples want to wait a few years to get financially stable or to enjoy time to the 2 of them without children. Good luck.

ChellaTims

I also have PCOS and I know what you're going through on that level but I don't have endometriosis, however, my mothers boss's wife (she works in a tiny auto shop and we're very close) has endometriosis. I know that it took them close to 6 years to have their son and they were not able to have a second. They went through a lot of treatments and spent a lot of money in the process. Just having PCOS I know that before I TTC I'll spend the year before getting my body ready for it because usually PCOS really effects more of your bodily processes than just TTC. I hope you've been going to a fertility specialist and not just a normal OBGYN because the fertility specialist will know the extra test to run to make sure you're body is functioning correctly in all areas and they're also better equipped to tell you the answer to your questions too. I've always gone to a fertility specialist simply because I have special health issues that need a special doctor. I would also suggest joining or at least reading through the message boards and the information on Soul Cysters www.soulcysters.com/ .

brilibby4

We just got married a little over a month ago and plan to start TTC within the next year.  We have lived together for years so we don't feel we need to spend much time enjoying "just being married" before having children.

Just H

Your post is very timely for me!  H and I were married in July.  We have been together 12 years and are both 29.  I had my IUD removed Monday.  We will still use back up protection for a few months, but I wanted to get a regular cycle going.  My Dr. also recommended that I take prenatal vitamins for 3 months before we start TTC.  I have found The Bump TTC board helpful.  Good Luck!

KellyBrian2013

DH and I were just married on the 3rd. He wants babies, like, yesterday... I want to finish school first. I also think we should have some "us" time before throwing kids into the mix, and he agrees, especially given we are the first of our friends to get married (so we're also the only ones who would even be considering little ones).

We're planning to start TTC in 2 years or so... however, if it happens in the meantime, it happens.

I think it is also a bit different for us in that we've only been together 2 years... our engagement was twice as long as our dating relationship (engaged after 8 months), so we definitely still want to cherish the time just the two of us. DH is 26, I'm 24... his goal is ultimately to have a baby on the way by the time he hits 30.

rlavach

We just got married & aren't planning on TTC anytime soon. We've only been together for 2 years, so we really feel that we need to be a strong connected couple before we go down that route. We need more time to strengthen our relationship. Besides, we're not in a financial place to do so right now. We're looking at 5y down the road. Maybe things will change along the way. Who knows. I do know that my gyno says I have some issues in there that she didn't feel the need to fully investigate until we TTC. Then we'll look into whether or not it will affect anything. But right now, it wouldn't matter to me. 

Loopyseven

We waited about a year after we got married to start trying while we took care of putting some financial stuff in order. It took us close to a year of trying before I got pregnant. After 13 cycles in 9 months due to a VERY short luteal phase with my cycle we saw a fertility specialist and I was lucky to only need progesterone supplements to get and stay pregnant. The TTGP board on the bump is an awesome resource for charting and learning to read your body and your cycles and once you are working with a specialist the Trouble Trying To Conceive board is extremely knowledgable and helpful when you become a part of their community. The decision of when to start is a personal one for everyone. With a diagnosed fertility issue though, I'd aim to start the process sooner rather than later once you are on stable financial ground to deal with the costs of testing and treatment.

julibug86

I've been wondering the same thing myself!  I also have POSC so I feel conflicted on what to do after we marry in April.  He'll be 27 and I'll turn 27 the following week (the wedding is my birthday present!) and we will have been together for 3 1/2 yrs once we get married.  Part of me just wants to stop using any sort of protection and see what happens, even though I think we'd ideally like to have a couple of "just the two of us" years.  My sister also has POSC and didn't find out until she was TTC.  It took her 5 years (ages 24-29) to get pregnant! 

That wasn't really an answer, I guess, just input into other situations!

SunriseAmber

We are going through a similar situation except we aren't even married yet. We are getting married next year and we are going to start trying right after. I don't see anything wrong with it. You do what makes you and your H happy.

achiduck

I don't think we'll start TTC until 2-3 years after the wedding.

allychase

We're getting married in April and I want to start TTC within a year or two after. I'm the oldest of nine and pretty much ALWAYS have "baby fever" and there's been a huge baby boom in my family so seeing all these little babies isn't helping me any lol. If I were in your situation, I'd definitely try soon. But that's just me. I feel like I was born to be a mom and can't wait to have babies. It's hard when we have these extra empty rooms in our house and I can just picture setting them up as a nursery... Ahh let me stop haha

kaos16

It's funny you mention this now, my fiance has suddenly been all about babies the past week or two.

We get married in three and a half weeks, and plan to start TTC around our first anniversary.  I plan to speak to my doctor about it when I see her in a few months. . . just to get a baseline regarding any issues I might have, prenatal vitamins, going off BC pills, etc.

Ali092011

Last month I had a handful of weird symptoms that added up to me being potentially pregnant, and when I mentioned my symptoms, FI was practically jumping up and down. He loves kids, and if I got pregnant accidentally, he'd be psyched. I, on the other hand, am not ready to give up our freedom yet. I see how hard it is for my friends with kids to get out of the house, go to the movies, have any "me time." I'm just not ready, even though I'm almost 28 and I feel like I should be.

m tulli

I think not waiting is wise. I have both PCOS and endometriosis. I didn't find this out till I tried to conceive with my first husband. The endo crushed my falopien tubes. On the plus side I know people with one or the other that did have children. If I had know earlier I would not have waited so long to try.

tlc35

Ugh, this is a bit difficult for me too.  I don't have any diagnosed fertility issue except that i am already considered "advanced maternal age".  i would love to wait a year or so but since we want more than 1 kid if possible and I am already 35 I don't know if that is a good idea.  I may just go off birth control after the HM and see what happens.

CurlsNpearls12

Thanks for the replies, ladies. I appreciate hearing everyone else's plans!