inviting co workers

mintycj

Ive been working at a small private school for 11 years. Ive grown to be very close with several of my coworkers. Two of my co workers are in my wedding and Im inviting other co workers to my wedding. Do I have to invite ALL of my coworkers even though we are not close at all? I dont want to hurt anyone's feelings but I also have to keep my guest count at 125. If I do invite all of my coworkers, is it ok not to invite their husbands? That would help with the count. Ugggggg. Help!

Mrs.B6302007

You absolutely MUST invite their husbands/SO's.

If it's a small school, I would be careful about not inviting everyone.  Are you divided into departments? 

Stackeye210

I work with only 13 people and I didn't invite all of them.  I dont think anyone was offended and if they were they were over it before I returned from the honeymoon.  You do have to invite the spouses, you can't get out of that one. 

bhentze

Are you really close with all the people you work with? I agree with pp. You shouldn't feel obligated to invite co workers, but if you invite your co worker, you HAVE to invite their spouses.

People you are not close with should not expect to be invited, and like it was mentioned, if they are offended they will probably get over it quickly.

goheels05

No, you don't have to invite everyone, but anyone you do invite, you MUST invite their spouse.

Mrs.B6302007

 Are you there OP?  It's me, Mrs. B.


For real.  If you're going to post a question have the courtesy to say you're posting and running.  We can't offer much more advice at the moment because there are questions to be answered by, um, you.

mintycj

Ok thanks. I will invite the co workers that Im close to and their husbands. The other co workers will get over it Im sure

Mrs.B6302007

But are you in a department or grade level?  Depending on the size of that, you have to be very careful about dividing those people into invites and non-invites.  If your dept is 40 people and your grade level is 10, I'd invite the grade level and not the department.

mintycj

Im going to invite my WHOLE department and a couple other people from another department

Mrs.B6302007

Well then, you're good to go. 

stinkerbell6879

I am inviting my co-workers, I work at a small law firm, and I only did this cause I could not just invite the few I wanted too without hurting some feelings, so there went my smaller guest count....So just make sure that it will not make it harder to invite people that you REALLY want there.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

I do not think people are so super offended at not being invited to a wedding as most of us think. I mean, you get a Saturday night to yourself and don't need to buy a gift if you aren't invited. But then, you have to pay for your own dinner. So it's a trade-off.

mintycj

Good way to put it! Thanks:) I was concerned because ever since Ive been engaged(9 months ago) all of my co workers have been asking me details about my wedding. When they ask me about my wedding plans and are getting excited for me it makes me feel obligagted to invite them all. I know I dont HAVE to invite everyone, I just feel bad because some are invited and some are not.

stinkerbell6879

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-co-workers-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:55f97d2d-9691-44b9-b0da-87ab666ed2daPost:0f2eaec0-c242-4569-ac15-e5aaace0830d">Re: inviting co workers</a>:
[QUOTE]I do not think people are so super offended at not being invited to a wedding as most of us think. I mean, you get a Saturday night to yourself and don't need to buy a gift if you aren't invited. But then, you have to pay for your own dinner. So it's a trade-off.
Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]

I think you are right about this, if my work was a little bit bigger I prob would have done it differently.We are pretty small group and I heard how bad they talked about the last girl to get married that did not invite anyone....