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Dad or no Dad

RstruchRstruch member
First Comment
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
My dad and I are not close. We dont have a relationship and we do not talk regularily  however there are some people on my side of the family who say I should invite him just because he is my dad. What should I do?
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Re: Dad or no Dad

  • AlexiaANDRobertAlexiaANDRobert
    2500 Comments
    I think if there isn't any negative feelings, just a lack of feelings, you should invite him.

    Like if you don't have a relationship because you just don't have one, or you don't have one because he did something terrible.

    I hope that makes sense...

    Good luck!
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  • danieliza1127danieliza1127 member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    I don't have a relationship or any contact with my Dad, and haven't for my entire adult life, so I didn't invite him.  But no one in my family questioned that decision and I'm not in contact with his family either, so there was no pressure to invite him.

    I think only you can decide this.  If you ever want to work on having a relationship with him, invite him.  If you don't and you really don't want him to be there, then don't.
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  • sarah0725sarah0725
    5000 Comments
    Only you know how bad it is between you and your dad, and only you truly know the answer to this. I know there are several ladies on this board who chose not to invite their dads because of various reasons, and it is a very personal choice.
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  • AmoroAgainAmoroAgain member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dad-dad?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:568a70ce-7b90-4dc2-bb02-80a91b8a5b10Post:c32298e6-48e3-447b-b40c-82949094c67d">Re: Dad or no Dad</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't have a relationship or any contact with my Dad, and haven't for my entire adult life, so I didn't invite him.  But no one in my family questioned that decision and I'm not in contact with his family either, so there was no pressure to invite him. I think only you can decide this.  If you ever want to work on having a relationship with him, invite him.  If you don't and you really don't want him to be there, then don't.
    Posted by danieliza1127[/QUOTE]

    I agree with this.  I didn't invite my father because i've let him out of my life in the last couple of years.  People questioned it, but it's not for them to answer- it's for me.  This is absolutely what YOU want and what YOU feel comfortable with.
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  • britne28britne28
    500 Comments
    Do what is comfortable for you.  You can invite him if you want but you can have him just as a guest.  He doesn't have to walk you down the aisle or do the father daughter dance.
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  • wcvsb3b5wcvsb3b5
    500 Comments
    I think if you will be uncomfortable with him there then you shouldn't invite him. But if there is no actual reason to not invite him then I would probably invite him. This is a tough thing for an outsider to help you with. Only you know what you really want. Do you think it would hurt him if he wasn't invited? And if it did would it bother you that it hurt him? If the answer is no to either one of these I would probably pass..
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  • RstruchRstruch member
    First Comment
    Thanks everyone for the responses. You all brought up great points for me to think about.
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