childcare at venue

packlite

Hi...so we originally planned to have a "no kids" wedding.  we did not invite children of the couples we are inviting.  the only kids at the wedding will be flowergirls and nieces and nephews (ok, so its not really no kids then).  we do have a handul of guests with kids that are 1 and under - that are coming from out of town to attend our wedding.  some have already booked tickets, but i guess didnt get that since their kids name wasnt on the envelope that he/she wasnt invited.  so now, they whole crew is coming.

im thinking abt arranging for childcare to be provdided during the ceremony and reception for those few folks (5) who have 1 and unders.  do you think this is ok?

what i don't want to do is have this open the floodgates for everyone to think that their kids are invited. 

is this possible? or should we take the all or nothing approach?

how do u tell someone who has already booked their ticket that their kid cant come?

shellydiane820

You can offer childcare, but I would check with the family first to see if they would utilize it.

You might mention to them you hadn't planned on having children at the wedding. They might have time to cancel.

packlite

nope we didnt issue invites to any kids accept for the kids i listed above which are all immediate family members.  they booked the ticket AFTER receiving their invite but their kids name (they have like 8 kids, but are only bringing the youngest) was not printed on the inner envelope.  only the parents names were.

this is really the only special case with kids we have so far.

Calypso1977

on "the" wedding day... not "their" wedding day...

Calypso1977

how do you know they bought a ticket??  is the child young enough that it wouldnt have its own ticket anyway?  i think under 2 they can fly on a parent's lap.  still, tehy'd have to leave ti at home.

but its simple enough to cancel one or both tickets.  they just have to use the  money within a year and pay a small change fee.  its their screw up, not yours.

brilibby4

Most parents I know wouldn't put their babies in childcare with babysitters they had never met before.  If they planned to bring their children, I'm sure they can handle their kids for the night.  However, if you don't want kids there and didn't invite them then tell them you are sorry but the invite was addressed to mom and dad only.  It is their fault for adding to the invite imo.  Be prepared for some parents to be annoyed if they make new plans and then see other children that you allowed at the wedding though.

packlite

well his mom told my mom that she so excited that cousin, cousins wife, and the little bambino were coming to the wedding.  and that they spent all this $$ on their plane tickets and hotel.  and they are excited to show off bambino b/c no one has see him before...ummm yeah...so mom just told me this.

thinking of providing the couple with a list of babysitters that our venue recommends and being done with it. 

strlzfan11

If the kids in question are under 1, there is a chance that they're still nursing so I think that having them at the wedding won't be such a big deal because nursing infants *should* be the exception to the no-kids rule (outside of immediate family & those in the WP).  But that's JMO.  I don't think you need to provide childcare for them, but if you decide to go that route, ask the parents in question (as suggested by PP) if they would utitlize it before you spend time and money lining it up.

Calypso1977

why didnt your mom say anything????

i would call them ASAP while they still have some time to make plans.

quotequeen

They probably assumed it wouldn't be a problem to bring an infant who doesn't require a seat or a meal and they probably didn't want to leave the infant at home.  That probably also means they wouldn't be willing to leave the infant with a random stranger.

packlite

to the PP, idk WHY my mom didnt say anything at the time, but my guess is b/c she is a yes person and like to please everyone, where as I would have just said it right then and there. 

missy68

They would need a seat if they're flying with a car seat and plan to put the child in that.

mysticl

I think a lot of people consider a child under 1 to be the exception to the "no kids" rule.  For the reasons of they don't get charged for by the venue and if they are nursing they need to be with their mother, especially if they are traveling.  If they lived in the same town it wouldn't be as big of an issue for the mother to be away for a few hours and just  pump.  But for a few days is a different balll game. 

Providing childcare is sticky.  You have the issues of parents not wanting to leave their child with strangers.  Also, making sure you find appropriate childcare.