I have been having the worst time with my mother in terms of weddng planning. She seems to more concerned with the flower-girl in my wedding than me. I initially thought I was being childish and hypersensitive. However, events in the past couple of months has reinforced this belief. My flower-girl is my brother's daughter and 4 years old. My mother showed up to my first dress fitting 45 minutes late (no explanation), talked to me for five minutes, and then proceeded to walk around the bridal salon looking for a dress for niece. The dress came in recently and is too small for my niece. My mother has called me for the past few days complaining about how small the dress is. She paid for the dress so I am perplexed as to what she wants me to do. In addition to this, my mother is upset with my choice for the flowergirl's bouquet-a pomander (a "flower ball"). She envisioned my niece walking down the aisle throwing rose petals everywhere. Also, I had my last fitting this week, and my 'maids all live in a different state. When I asked her to come so she could learn how to do the bustle, she said she couldn't. However, she was at the mall across from my bridal salon shopping with you guessed it, my 4 year old niece and her mother. I should also mention the my niece is little devil in the making; she is very aware that she is the center of attention. My niece even told me that she "was going to be prettier than me" on my wedding day (not making that up but someone coached her on that one). I have already tried talking to my mom; she became hysterical and shut down. I could go on and on about the things that have happened in the last couple of months. I feel like I am in some dysfunctional passive-aggressive cycle. Suggestions for how to cope with the big day?