What is the proper etiquette?

My FI's mother has been battling colorectal cancer for almost two years. She has been through two bouts of chemotherapy and radiation, a colostomy, and will soon be starting her third round of chemotherapy and radiation. To be frank, her prognosis does not seem to be the best. Her mother passed from the same cancer five years ago and she went downhill quickly.

We still have a little more than eight months to go before the official date. If it came to it and it didn't seem like she was going to make it that far, what does etiquette say about a private ceremony for my parents and his parents and keeping all original plans for the actual date? What would you all advise me to do if this situation became very bad very fast?

Sorry, I wasn't going to ask, but reading the DPC thread has broken my heart. We have both lost friends, grandparents, aunts, and uncles, but we have not yet lost a parent. This most recent development in her battle has only just happened this week and we had our little cry about it. I am not the type of person who cannot have plans for plans or not know what to do if something happens so of course I have plans for plans. Get it?

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We did it! June 9, 2012

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