NWR (obvs): SIster Wives

mermaidutp

I think Kody said in a past episode that they are Fundamentalist Mormons. 
Did anyone else find that it added a whole new level of strange when you found out that Janelle's mom is the second wife to Kody's dad?

To each their own - if this is what these people choose to do - as long as they aren't taking advantage of "the system" - that's their business.  I like Christine, Mary, and Janelle for the most part.  Robyn...is kind of a big baby and she doesn't seem terribly intelligent.  Kody...is obnoxious.  He's seems full  of himself.  I just don't understand why they all think that he's worth sharing?  You'd think he'd be some brilliant, rich, handsome Adonis if four women were willing to share him.

luckyme502

See, I can totally understand the attraction of polygamy.  It seems, to me, that it has its benefits.  Janelle likes to work and doesn't like staying home with the kids, so Christine stays home and takes care of the kids and cooks dinner.  It's a win-win since Christine has no desire to work and likes staying home with the kids. I should add that I have watched every episode.  I think they were On Demand with comcast for free. 

manychihuahuas

I also can see the appeal.  I work constantly and would love to have someone to take over the home duties.  Never having to do laundry or go to the grocery store again would be heaven!  That said, I think having another woman anound all the time would bug me.  Not out of sexual jealousy but just having another person around to stumble over.  It took long enough to get used to the FI there all the time!  

Mrs.B6302007

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-obvs-sister-wives?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6fa2b563-a3b6-416d-9cc0-f245f260972fPost:31105e7c-e759-4fa9-9869-76df811f7283">Re: NWR (obvs): SIster Wives</a>:
[QUOTE] Did anyone else find that it added a whole new level of strange when you found out that Janelle's mom is the second wife to Kody's dad?
Posted by mermaidutp[/QUOTE]

0_0

Calypso1977

ive thought the insurance thing out.

Kody can have one spouse on his plan unless they allow domestic partners.  if they allow domestic partner, he probably has Christine since she doesnt work.

Meri has a job so she has her own insurance.

Janelle has a job so seh has her own insurance.

the kids are all biolgically kody's so he could in theory put them on his plan.

Birdie1483

On one of their last shows or a tv special I remember Kody saying that his boss is really understanding of his lifestyle.

I don't know if that means his boss is really understanding about insuring all of his 20 kids or if he's really understanding about insuring all of his 20 kids and four wives.

Calypso1977

yes, but i assume Robyn's kids can be covered under the ex-husband - and he might even be covering her depending upon their divorce agreement.

Calypso1977

the one thing i dont get tho is why Robyn didnt secure employment BEFORE she married and relocated her family. 

i was surprised to hear they have financial issues - kody could sell his sports car and his motorcycle.  they cant be THAT poor if he can afford "toys".  but clearly he's a spendthrift - i was totally on team Jannelle with hte sleeping bags.

pearlaqua

Same issue here, the way they practice their faith is their business but I can't get over the logistical implications of so many needs for just one father's attention and just two incomes. (Meri lost her job due to coming out as a polygamist)

They aren't like the Duggars (of "19 Kids and Counting") who tell viewers how they afford their large family: sound investments, thrifty living, and home-made EVERYTHING.  Whereas the Brown family seems to be outfitted with store-bought clothing and have modern cars (and not all church van-type transport- I'm looking at your Lexus, Kody). 

I also wonder if the women who aren't legally married to Kody can or do collect welfare for being technically single moms.  That's gaming the system and fraud to me.  A marker of the compounds and ranches of more extreme FLDS-type polygamists is that the families are tax deniers as a tenet of their faith (they see it as conscientious objection to a government that won't recognize their marriages) but the families still collect lots of money for welfare and other scams.  

Another scam is to collect government money from programs meant to help families build their homes but the homes are never completely built, so funds keep coming in for homes that are unbuilt.  If you've ever driven through AZ or other compound-heavy communities, you'd see what I'm talking about.

The show isn't as extreme as a show about one of the FLDS ranches, though.  Even the Browns' doctrine is more relaxed (unlike the FLDS, they don't think the mainstream Church of Jesus Christ of LAtter-day Saint (Mormon) has lost its way theologically.  The Browns' faith believes the mainstream Mormons are legitimate, kind of the way Lutherans acknowledge Catholics as a legitimate faith.

Interesting show.

Calypso1977

I also wonder if the women who aren't legally married to Kody can or do collect welfare for being technically single moms.  That's gaming the system and fraud to me.  

sure, they might.  but i can  name a dozen single moms i know that live with their boyfriends who do the same thing or who live with their parents and do teh same thing.  i dont agree with that either.

really, the only difference i see is that this guy lives under the same roof with all of these women (except Robyn, but he woudl if he could).  IMO, it isnt polygamy since he doesnt have multiple wives.  he's never tried to have any type of a legal marriage to anyone but Meri.  according to the state, he has one wife, then he's chosen to father other children with women to whom he isnt legally wed.  men do that every day in this country - i think they are called "baby daddys".  only in kody's example, he is at least present and takes care of his family.  sure, he isnt with all of the kids every day but there are many kids who see dad only one or two weekends a month.

pearlaqua

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-obvs-sister-wives?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6fa2b563-a3b6-416d-9cc0-f245f260972fPost:6dd90fc4-7f2a-4471-a1a7-aa689d5f5f11">Re: NWR (obvs): SIster Wives</a>:
[QUOTE] sure, they might.  but i can  name a dozen single moms i know that live with their boyfriends who do the same thing or who live with their parents and do teh same thing.  i dont agree with that either. really, the only difference i see is that this guy lives under the same roof with all of these women (except Robyn, but he woudl if he could).  IMO, it isnt polygamy since he doesnt have multiple wives.  he's never tried to have any type of a legal marriage to anyone but Meri.  according to the state, he has one wife, then he's chosen to father other children with women to whom he isnt legally wed.  men do that every day in this country - i think they are called "baby daddys".  only in kody's example, he is at least present and takes care of his family.  sure, he isnt with all of the kids every day but there are many kids who see dad only one or two weekends a month.
Posted by Calypso1977[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>Yes, the time and commitment to being a dad is more than "baby daddies" out there and that probably makes him a better father.</div><div>
</div><div>BUT their religion stipulates that you only take on as many wives as you can support.  You're not supporting them if you can only afford them if the government steps in.</div><div>
</div><div>Polygamous societies (Muslim, Christian, African polytheist) all tend to share the tenet that you can have as many wives as you can support and as long as they are all taken care of equally and fairly.</div><div>
</div><div>My problem with Kody is that he is having his cake (in his mind receiving whatever blessings he thinks come to men who are "able" to have many wives) and eating it too (not having to actually support those wives).</div><div>
</div><div>The reason this show was supposed to be different was because it highlights how normal and everyday polygamous families can be.  While really, I'm afraid that it is highlighting that polygamous families have to BY NECESSITY depend on the government.</div><div>
</div><div>There was a 20/20 special on a polygamous family in Texas where the husband was rich.  Like, Texas oil "Dynasty", Porsche-driving rich.  I thought that was fascinating because the family could subsist on their own and really live their lives the way they wanted to without public opinion because the public wasn't subsidizing their decisions.</div><div>
</div><div>I'm afraid the Browns (if this is their situation) are only equating polygamy with poverty and female oppression (being on welfare is not an independent way of living) in the public eye.  I don't think this was their goal at the outset. </div><div>
</div>

Irishcurls

Ok I didn't watch last night (sill FI having the remote) but I'm mildly obsessed with the show. I mean, how do you think Kody got ONE woman to marry him, let alone four?? Does. not. compute. But I think they had a good thing going until cry-baby Robin came along and jacked it all up.

One thing about the money though--I'm a firm believer that that's the reason people GO on these shows. Hello 'John and Kate Plus 8.' He's an IT guy, no way they were making it with 8 kids. Oh, so we'll get a tv show to pay us.

Which is bringing up another pet peeve of mine. I sort of love/hate the Duggars but does anyone think it's strange they aren't allowed to watch tv, but they are on tv?? Ca-ching!!

pearlaqua

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-obvs-sister-wives?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6fa2b563-a3b6-416d-9cc0-f245f260972fPost:eb69bc5a-4899-4753-95a2-ed5d8270e561">Re: NWR (obvs): SIster Wives</a>:
[QUOTE]I sort of love/hate the Duggars but does anyone think it's strange they aren't allowed to watch tv, but they are on tv?? Ca-ching!!
Posted by Irishcurls[/QUOTE]

<div>Pretty sure they think it's a missionary tool, like, a way for many people to hear their message.  Like people who don't believe in working on Sundays but if they are doctors and someone needs help, they don't look at it as breaking the Sabbath? Maybe the Duggars see TV as a necessary evil of that type. </div><div>
</div><div>At least with the Browns, they aren't opposed to sending their daughters to college if that is what they choose so that they might have better prospects for themselves and their families. And not have to, you know, go on TV to pay their bills.</div><div>
</div><div>And interestingly, the Brown girls don't all necessarily want to be polygamists.  I think two of the teenaged daughters have said as much on camera.  Whereas the Duggars are repeating the same cycle with their first daughter in-law (who is now a mom herself!). </div><div>
</div>

Calypso1977

wait, the duggars dont believe in college for girls?

well, we dont know for sure whether the Browns are on public assistance.  it woudl be interesting to find out.

pearlaqua

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-obvs-sister-wives?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6fa2b563-a3b6-416d-9cc0-f245f260972fPost:e891b2f9-9a74-4f4e-829b-2ab263aeab1a">Re: NWR (obvs): SIster Wives</a>:
[QUOTE]wait, the duggars dont believe in college for girls? well, we dont know for sure whether the Browns are on public assistance.  it woudl be interesting to find out.
Posted by Calypso1977[/QUOTE]

<div>Nope. Women's primary role is to be good wives and mothers.  I don't disagree with that, I guess the Duggars' denomination is lucky to be so closely-knit that they can pretty much guarantee that their daughters will find a faithful spouse within the faith OR if marriage isn't an option, that they can spend their time helping their mothers raise their brothers and sisters.</div>

Pod0512

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-obvs-sister-wives?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:6fa2b563-a3b6-416d-9cc0-f245f260972fPost:885ae78f-c0de-437f-9690-528c974edf68">Re: NWR (obvs): SIster Wives</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NWR (obvs): SIster Wives : Nope. Women's primary role is to be good wives and mothers.  I don't disagree with that, I guess the Duggars' denomination is lucky to be so closely-knit that they can pretty much guarantee that their daughters will find a faithful spouse within the faith OR if marriage isn't an option, that they can spend their time helping their mothers raise their brothers and sisters.
Posted by pearlaqua[/QUOTE]

Where did you get that information?  I'm pretty sure one of the girls is taking courses in becoming a midwife, so maybe not traditional college, but I doubt they're barred from ever getting education beyond HS if she so desires.

pearlaqua

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-obvs-sister-wives?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6fa2b563-a3b6-416d-9cc0-f245f260972fPost:cdc5efcc-80c0-492d-8368-b7f535be1de3">Re: NWR (obvs): SIster Wives</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NWR (obvs): SIster Wives : Where did you get that information?  I'm pretty sure one of the girls is taking courses in becoming a midwife, so maybe not traditional college, but I doubt they're barred from ever getting education beyond HS if she so desires.
Posted by Pod0512[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>TV... Momma Duggar said it a few times (I stopped watching a few years back.)

</div><div>The denomination has gotten a lot of press, I feel like that's also where I heard it.  I can look it up, I'm not just being mean to the Duggars.</div>

Pod0512

Oh, no I didn't think you were being mean to them.  I was just curious because I had never heard that before.  I just know from watching the show that a few of the girls are taking classes so I didn't know if there was information I was missing.

Calypso1977

wow.  even if they truly believe in women being wives and mothers, an education (or at least job skill training) is necessary IMO, in the event your husband dies suddenly and you are left alone to care for and support your family.

btu, i guess they also think that everyone will live next door to everyone for eternity, so therefore family can help you out rather than you needing to be self sufficient.  nothing wrong with that either i suppose, although its not for me.