FI and I would like a wedding with as few children as possible. I am the youngest of the cousins on my dad's side, and almost all of my cousins have very young children. These are really the children I would prefer not to have. I love them all, but this group includes many babies and toddlers. Also, adding all of these families would add 50 people, and I would prefer not to ask make parents to pay for a huge wedding as it was wonderful enough that they offered to pay. Here's the issue. My mom's side of the family is tiny. She has two brothers who have three children between them. The children are all under thirteen! And I am very close to them. The youngest will be our ring bearer, and he is an exception. The other two are 8 and 11, and I know they would have hurt feelings over being excluded. They are very well behaved, and I don't worry about them at all. The problem is that I know my other cousins will be very upset that the extra two children were invited, but their children were not. My father's side really does not make the distinction between groups of people (first and second cousin, etc.). I have two second cousins that are my age, and I know they would also be upset over not getting invited, but they fall in to the same category as my other cousin's children. If I invite those two second cousins I feel obligated to invite the whole circle. At a cousin's wedding in November one of my first cousin's six year old yelled through the entire ceremony how tired, upset, hungry he was, and kept yelling don't touch me! Two of the under two year olds cried through the entire thing and were either just held or put in the carrier. I love children, and i feel as though the other guests would be more comfortable if there were no screaming children present. So, I would just prefer not to have the little guys there. Would inviting the two older second cousins (my age) and my three younger first cousins be completely terrible if other children were left off? Sorry that's so long!!