I wonder

ricksang

I have been on this website for a while and I wonder why "looks" insults are off limits but insults like, "You should not breed",  "you idiot", or some other comment someone's intelligence is perfectly okay.   Why is one insult more hurtful than the other? What is your opinion?  

This isn't directed at anyone particular so don't be sensitive.

mwhitson14

Don't be sensitive?? I'm offended ricks, I have sensitive skin.

Simply Fated

Maybe because people here are self-concious abut their own looks? Or they've been teased about them, so they wouldn't tease others about theirs?

There is also a lot of pressure in our society to look a certain way and a lot of girls on here do not seem the type to have fallen for the "magazine" look. I mean that in a good way. It just seems like the girls on here prefer to look their own way instead of how we're "supposed" to look.

Looks to me are off-limits, for those reasons and more.

M&R7111

I think they are all equally insulting.

_Dagney_

Maybe because people can't help how they look, but they can (at least in theory) control the dumbass things they say.

katiewhompus

Whit, I want your drink...

I get why looks are off limits, but if someone were to say "Katiewhompus you are a complete moron and unintelligent" it would make me react emotionally in the same way as "Katiewhompus you are fat", so what's the difference? I guess that you can try to change how you act or are perceived? But in that aspect you can change how people see you as well through picture selection or just not using them.

nda_roxybabe

I think what dagney said.

ricksang

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wonder-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:7e2155f5-413e-41f6-b5bb-8e11e35e1990Post:568749e8-6275-4236-8cc0-806b0e3f9084">Re: I wonder</a>:
[QUOTE]Don't be sensitive?? I'm offended ricks, I have sensitive skin.
Posted by mwhitson14[/QUOTE]

I can tell white-y :P

ricksang

Good point Nova!

nda_roxybabe

I'm super senstive but nothing that has been said to/ about me on here has hurt my feelings. I just laugh it off because how do people know? If you've never met me, how could you know?

ricksang

Right Roxy!

nda_roxybabe

besides, I'm totally awesome :P

mwhitson14

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wonder-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:7e2155f5-413e-41f6-b5bb-8e11e35e1990Post:a0e38acd-9554-4f07-aac4-461b31871141">Re: I wonder</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I wonder : I can tell white-y :P
Posted by ricksang[/QUOTE]

OMG you're racist!!!

nda_roxybabe

You know though, if it was someone I really liked and respected who said something mean to me, it probably would hurt my feelings. Like the time my favorite 4th grade teacher got mad at me and I cried :P

ricksang

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wonder-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:7e2155f5-413e-41f6-b5bb-8e11e35e1990Post:edc5c228-16e8-4f8d-ac6d-3504013e0d24">Re: I wonder</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I wonder : OMG you're racist!!!
Posted by mwhitson14[/QUOTE]

Only against people in camo!!! Don't be hatin'! :P

tortis

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wonder-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:7e2155f5-413e-41f6-b5bb-8e11e35e1990Post:4e3a7a03-3df7-41aa-ac77-4290b38b9179">I wonder</a>:
[QUOTE]I have been on this website for a while and I wonder why "looks" insults are off limits but insults like, "You should not breed",  "you idiot", or some other comment someone's intelligence is perfectly okay.   Why is one insult more hurtful than the other? What is your opinion?   This isn't directed at anyone particular so don't be sensitive.
Posted by ricksang[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>There's things a person can change and there's things they can't. There's things a person wants to change, and tries to change, but can't. </div><div>
</div><div>I like to think that every person has the opportunity or the ability to be "intelligent," it's just whether you chose to express that or not. There is no such thing as a stupid person in my mind. You can act stupid, or you can act like an idiot, but that's different to me. Telling a person that they are generally a stupid person =/= telling them they acted stupidly in a certain situation.</div>

tortis

Fail. I just realized that this wasn't going in the serious direction. Ignore me.

ricksang

You didn't fail! I was serious.

mwhitson14

She was serious, I screwed it up.

katiewhompus

It was serious in the beginning though

But what if a person doesn't realize they are being stupid, or only one poster thinks they are being stupid and tells them so? That's hurtful as well.

And camo dining room is going away in less than 5 days, sooo excited!

Simply Fated

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wonder-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:7e2155f5-413e-41f6-b5bb-8e11e35e1990Post:95a82f58-4bef-4a05-a929-8b1fef68b517">Re: I wonder</a>:
[QUOTE]She was serious, I screwed it up.
Posted by mwhitson14[/QUOTE]
Idiot!



(jk I'm sorry, I couldn't resist <3 )

LP11509

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wonder-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:7e2155f5-413e-41f6-b5bb-8e11e35e1990Post:ad0d69b5-3e18-4856-a0a9-bea9b117225b">Re: I wonder</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to I wonder : You can act stupid, or you can act like an idiot, but that's different to me. Telling a person that they are generally a stupid person =/= telling them they acted stupidly in a certain situation.
Posted by tortis[/QUOTE]

I agree with this 100%,

tortis

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wonder-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:7e2155f5-413e-41f6-b5bb-8e11e35e1990Post:b1cd4e52-0d48-43a7-86d6-8200dd97107d">Re: I wonder</a>:
[QUOTE]It was serious in the beginning though ;) But what if a person doesn't realize they are being stupid, or only one poster thinks they are being stupid and tells them so? That's hurtful as well. And camo dining room is going away in less than 5 days, sooo excited!
Posted by katiewhompus[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>If someone honesty doesn't realize they are being "stupid," then I agree, that can be extremely hurtful. I've been there more than I'd like to admit.</div><div>
</div><div>At this point, because I missed the direction of the thread, I'd like to divert your attention to my puppy. </div>

katiewhompus

I want to play with his floppy little ears...

mwhitson14

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wonder-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:7e2155f5-413e-41f6-b5bb-8e11e35e1990Post:865a62d5-ce1e-4577-84d5-7bc1271cf5dd">Re: I wonder</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I wonder : Idiot! (jk I'm sorry, I couldn't resist <3 )
Posted by Simply Fated[/QUOTE]

No you just diiiin't!

::snaps::

nda_roxybabe

Whatever Cs, youre an idiot! :P

tortis

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wonder-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:7e2155f5-413e-41f6-b5bb-8e11e35e1990Post:1f22f9b5-0178-4a15-810c-161ab76d641b">Re: I wonder</a>:
[QUOTE]I want to play with his floppy little ears...
Posted by katiewhompus[/QUOTE]

<div>That's my buddy. That was like 3-4 months ago so he's a  big guy now. But he's still my baby so thats ok.</div><div>
</div><div>What kind of puppy do you have (I used the word puppy in reference to dogs  who were just born and up)</div>

ricksang

Oh I love the puppy!
 
Anyway, I was just getting ewveryone's veiw on the subject/trying to get this board to move at night since I am not here during the day.

Simply Fated

I don't really see the word "idiot" thrown around too much here. But I also don't go into the FFF threads, so... I might be a bit sheltered.

tortis

Ricks- get the board moving however you want. I agree. I can't be on during the day and it's slow at night

sarah0725

I kind of think both are offensive, although calling a person's intelligence into question may have more grounds than picking on looks. I've definitely seen blanket statements in FFF like "so and so always sounds like an idiot" made by people who don't always sound so smart themselves, and I think that kind of thing is pretty rude. However, I think there are cases that can be a grey area. For instance, I know I've cast aspersions on Lab's smarts.

Making fun of somebody's looks, though, is just sucky all around. Of course, we all think mean things, but to say them just lacks class. There's no reason for it, and it's no way to win an argument.