Reception only invites

cleverdear

My fiance and I are having a small, private ceremony with family only and are planning on a reception for family and all our friends that night.  I'm trying to get invites sent out to all our friends we'd like to attend the reception...  since it will be on the day of the wedding (due to most of our family living out of town), how do I word the invites?  The only wording I can find is using the married couple's names requesting the honour of your presence at a celebration of their marriage...  If it is fine to send this out, even though we will be getting married on that day, it's fine, but I want to be sure.

Any ideas? 

cebrady89

Sending out reception only invites is fine! Be careful with wording though...

"the honour of your presence" indicates that guests are being invited to a church, so I would definitely not use that phrase since you are only inviting them to a reception.

Also, DO NOT send these out with your married name - you will be married before the reception, but you will not be married at the time that these invitations arrive in the mail to your guests. So you should list your names as you would if you were inviting these people to the ceremony as well as the reception.

I would say something like:

Together with their families

Jane Doe and John Smith

request the pleasure of your company

at a reception celebrating their marriage

date

time

place

You don't have to say that the ceremony was the same day or anything, just make sure you're clearly inviting them to a reception, not a ceremony.

Hope this helps!

AdeleDazeem

I need to confirm a few things before I tell you how to word this.

How many people at the ceremony?
How many people at the reception?

artbyallie

This is only okay if "small and private with family only" means immediate family only and <20 people max.

Mrs.B6302007

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_reception-only-invites-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8dd869a2-ed01-4ab2-9ddd-8903c67f39f1Post:f4f859cd-5e68-44af-8006-0120774d1739">Re: Reception only invites</a>:
[QUOTE]I need to confirm a few things before I tell you how to word this. How many people at the ceremony? How many people at the reception?
Posted by Joy2611[/QUOTE]


This.  OP, what numbers are we talking here?

RebeccaB88

Even though it's technically acceptable to have a very private ceremony and a larger reception, some people will still be VERY offended and/or hurt to not be included in the ceremony.  For most of us, the ceremony is the most important part of the celebration, and we feel like if you don't want us at the ceremony, then you don't want us at the reception either.  Tiny ceremony = tiny reception.  I most likey would not show up to your reception if not also invited to the ceremony.  But, I understand budgets and preferences for small weddings, so if I don't get an invitation at all, that's okay.  I'm just going to be pissed off if you think I'm only good enough to be there for the less important event of the day.

Again, you aren't technically breaking any rules here, but I'd make sure that you take the feelings of your guests into account before making any final decisions.  It's not worth offending someone you care about, and if asked, most people will tell you it's okay whether it is or isn't, to keep from hurting your feelings.

cleverdear

Only 40 at the wedding and probably 200 at the reception.

Thank you!

cleverdear

This is a second marriage for us both and only family will be at the wedding.  Large second weddings are frowned upon in our social circles.  Believe me, we've taken our friends feelings into consideration and talked at length about it.  Our friends are happy with this and are looking forward to celebrating our marriage at the reception.