Postwedding brunch

SamRaye

If the wedding is on the sunday of a 3 day weekend and most of the guests live about an hour away, is it presumptuous to have a late wedding and a monday morning brunch, making people feel obligated to pay for another night at the hotel? There will be festivities saturday as well. I'm starting to think it's too much. Thoughts?

bonge

why would you want to have festivities the day before the wedding when there is so much to do for last minute details?

I am having a 2 day ordeal but no one is obligated to stay. I am having a late day wedding so that people can come in that day & only really have to spend 1 night in a hotel, 2 if they want to take advantage & visit more with people (most are 5-6 or more hours away & do not get here often). 

I think 3 days is too much, but a brunch after the wedding is usually nice. 

mica178

The post-wedding brunch is optional for guests.  If they want to return home after the wedding, they can skip it and not pay for an extra night in a hotel.

I wouldn't make the Sunday wedding too late.  Not everyone will have a three day weekend.

cbvcru67

I don't feel like offering a brunch requires an "extra" night stay in a hotel.  I know it's different in every circle, but in my experience, people will typically stay over at the hotel the night of a wedding to save themselves from having a late night and then driving a long distance or to avoid drinking and driving.   So, most guests I know would be staying over regardless of the brunch - so I think it's a very thoughtful thing to offer.

What kind of events are you offering on Saturday that would require them to stay an additional night before the wedding?

jessicabessica

I would decide whether you hope to have more people attend the Saturday events or the Monday brunch.  If you want people to be more likely to come for the Saturday stuff, have your wedding earlier on Sunday.  If you want people to be more likely to stay for the brunch, have the wedding later in the day, so people can travel in on Sunday if they'd like.  You can still have both events, just ask people to RSVP so you can plan--your guests don't have to attend all the weekend events.

If I was going to travel an hour to a wedding, I probably would not stay for 2 nights unless I was going to see lots of friends and family that I rarely see.  An hour is not that long of a drive.  

I got married the Sunday of July 4th weekend (the 4th was on Monday), and we had a BBQ on Saturday afternoon and a brunch on Monday.  Our wedding was in the afternoon (over by 7), so people could head out or get an early start the next day if they had other plans for the 4th.  Most people were there for the entire weekend, but we had people coming from a much further distance than you're talking about.

Summer2011Bride

Well the Sat..and Mon. activities are optional. Make sure you word it as such, esp. for WP members so they DON'T feel obligated to come to all of them. What types of things are you doing on Sat? I might get rid of either the Sat. or Mon. activities. I do think three days might be overkill, but I think you also might underestimate how exhausting the wedding day will be for you and the fact that you might want Monday to be very relaxing and/or Sat. to be one last day to get thingss together.

I do think you should have an earlier wedding, too, if it's on a Sunday or wrap up around dinnertime or shortly thereafter. Even though it might be a holiday on Monday, I know plenty of people who have to work those holidays. Heck, when I was in college, my college didn't take Labor Day off and I still had class that day! It won't be a holiday for everyone, and if it goes too late, more people might be likely to decline coming at all.

Starqueg

Make everything but the wedding optional and keep the wedding at a normal time (not scheduling it to end really late).  A lot of people don't get off for some holidays, even major ones.  My dad works Memorial Day two out of every three years and a lot of people in his line of work have no choice but to work July 4th. 
I'm having a Sunday wedding, the day before MLK day.  My fiance works in the courts so we know he has off, but a lot of other people won't.  We're doing dinner with OOT guests on Friday night, services at our synagogue Saturday morning, and hiding from all our guests on Saturday night.  If people are around for dinner or services, they're welcome to be there, but none of it is required. 

kateguess22

What are the Saturday festivities? I felt obligated at a wedding that I was in the wedding party to to stay in a hotel for 3 nights and I felt it was too much. Like others have said if it feels truly optional then it's not a big deal.

hoffse

We're doing a brunch the sunday morning following a Saturday wedding.  For people at the rehearsal, that will be a 3-day thing.  That said, the Sunday brunch is entirely optional and is really for family/out-of-towners who don't get to see us more than once every few years.  I will extend the offer to any members of the wedding party who want to come but it's by no means a mandatory thing.  We're just hosting something for those whose flights leave in the afternoon/evening.