To invite to bachelorette or not?

Stormes

I am wondering if you all can help me on etiquette protocol for the bachelorette party invitees. 

I have some family members like wives of cousins and a distant cousin + my brther's new wife that I don't know well and imagine would not actually have much interest in coming to the bachelorette party, but do I invite them anyway to be polite? 

My family is from a tiny town, and some of my cousins wives are more conservative so I'm not sure they would even enjoy a night out in the big city (Chicago) with me and my friends, and my brother's wife would definitely not enjoy herself. 

I don't want anyone to get hurt feelings, but I'm not sure where the breakdown falls in who is appropriate to invite.  Any suggestions?

How are you all coming up with your bachelorette invite list?  My BMs are looking for the list and approximate numbers for planning purposes.  While I don't want to be rude by not inviting people, I think my potential invite list reflects a greatly inflated number of attendees.  Probably about 1/3 will actually come. 

So where to cut, where not to?

Thanks!

Simply Fated

It's sort-of a known thing what goes on at a bachlorette party, so I doubt any of your conservative family members would even expect to be invited.

If you do invite them, the might decline. They might also show up and be miserable... and either leave or make you miserable. They could also show up and have a blast.

melissamc2

I didn't vote because I don't really feel that any apply.

"Under 40" eliminates some pretty damned fun people from my list - including me in two and a half years, so I don't think that's a good call.

However, I don't think you have to eliminate family.

Base it on who you'd have fun with, doing what is planned.  Age and bloodlines shouldn't have anything to do with it.

Stormes

Thanks to all for the advise. It helped. In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-bachelorette-not?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:908b14c6-b65d-4b6e-bac9-51dec07c5269Post:deba994f-57e7-4854-9d82-671fc338b09c">Re: To invite to bachelorette or not?</a>:
[QUOTE]I didn't vote because I don't really feel that any apply. "Under 40" eliminates some pretty damned fun people from my list - including me in two and a half years, so I don't think that's a good call. However, I don't think you have to eliminate family. Base it on who you'd have fun with, doing what is planned.  Age and bloodlines shouldn't have anything to do with it.
Posted by melissamc2[/QUOTE]

And just to let you know I certainly didn't mean to sound ageist with the "under 40," remark, just that anyone under 40 would cover all the cousins wives ect in my generation of the family, not as in I would purposefully exclude anyone over 40 so I worded that poorly. I do have a couple of over 40 pals that may come. =) I'm 30, and I only expect to be ten-years-worth-more-awesome at 40. Thanks, again! I ended up inviting cousins that I know will be in town but not my brother's wife at this point mostly because he still hasn't let me know when they will get in.