Honeymoon Registry

hfleet823

My fiance and I live together & basically have everything we could need. We booked our honeyroom through AAA and we signed up for the registry there and they provided us with registry annoucement cards. Now, I wasn't going to do anything with them until I realized all gift payments must be received by the end of July 2010 b/c our trip needs to be paid off by then but the wedding isn't until 09/18. Should I mail them out? Please help!

tlv204

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

salt78

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_honeymoon-registry-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:909b9a08-a56d-4b7c-bcde-3ea55fb8b72dPost:f58ae41e-cae9-4079-8353-368ba33e02f7">Honeymoon Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]My fiance and I live together & basically have everything we could need. We booked our honeyroom through AAA and we signed up for the registry there and they provided us with registry annoucement cards. Now, I wasn't going to do anything with them until I realized all gift payments must be received by the end of July 2010 b/c our trip needs to be paid off by then but the wedding isn't until 09/18. Should I mail them out? Please help!
Posted by hfleet823[/QUOTE]

MyNameIsNot

The fact that a honeymoon registry is tacky notwithstanding, no you do not mail them out.  You never mention anything about a registry to anyone until they ask, and you don't mail them any info about it either.

This is a perfect example of why you should book the honeymoon you can afford, and then spread the word that you're saving for the honeymoon.  You can then use cash gifts for spending money and extras on the trip.

anna.oskar

Please don't send out mailers asking guests to pay for you to have sex in a luxury hotel  setting. 

Plus, you'd be sending them to people that had yet to receive invites.

laurenclaire1386

No. Don't mail out a "registry announcement" card. Your friends and family presumably know that you're engaged and will ask where you're registered. Also, if they wanted to get you a physical gift, instead of pay for your sexfest, what would your guests do?

SarahPLiz

No. Don't mail them out.

And don't pay a fee for someone else to accept cash gifts for you. If you don't register, you will get cash gifts, with no surcharge. What a concept!

lyndausvi

This is exactly why I hate HM registries.  Most HM need to be paid off before or at least at the same time invites get sent off.  Most people I know give gifts at or only a few weeks before the wedding.

ootmother2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_honeymoon-registry-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:909b9a08-a56d-4b7c-bcde-3ea55fb8b72dPost:f58ae41e-cae9-4079-8353-368ba33e02f7">Honeymoon Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]My fiance and I live together & basically have everything we could need. We booked our honeyroom through AAA and we signed up for the registry there and they provided us with registry annoucement cards. Now, I wasn't going to do anything with them until I realized all gift payments must be received by the end of July 2010 b/c our trip needs to be paid off by then but the wedding isn't until 09/18. Should I mail them out? Please help!
Posted by hfleet823[/QUOTE]


I have a headache.

ThePinkSuperhero

Sounds like the whole thing was planned poorly- you really thought you'd be able to get enough gifts two months before your wedding (which is technically before you're even supposed to send out your invites)?

ootmother2

Someone get me a drink please.

tia

mwhitson14

You'll be VERY lucky if you get anyone to contribute to that TWO MONTHS before your wedding. I'm five weeks out and no one has bought anything off our registry yet.

lpstl

I'm going to be nice.

Honeymoon registries are generally considered in poor taste. Many of the companies that run them are a little shady, and really all they are is a cover to get cash from your guests.

You shouldn't mail out anything registry related to your guests.

If you don't want to receive material gifts the best thing you can do is not register (or make a very small registry, since the fact of the matter is you will get material gifts from some people), and let your immediate family and WP know that if they are asked where you are registered by a guest they can tell them know that you prefer cash gifts to go towards the honeymoon.

JanoBean75

This kills me.

playtntsbpg30

I don't know how or why people even come up with the thought of asking others to pay for their honeymoon.. Either take what you can afford now, hope someone offers, or take it 10 yrs from now.
everyone already answered your question...

and now i'm upset because you signed up on my birthday, you stoled my thunder!!

haha

pandasquishy

No, please don't mail them.  Those types of cards are useless anyway, you wouldn't put them in your wedding invitation, so you really should just throw them out.

mwhitson14

Well jessica she's already decided to do one and she's using AAA.

MeaghanandMichael

LPSTL - you are my hero right now.
My response was more along the lines of, "NOOOOOOO! you are a tacky selfish bridezilla/"

hfleet823

I can't believe how many people think honeymoon registries are "tacky". I just didn't know if there was a "better" way to go about it. AAA isn't charging us anything to have the registry so we aren't losing anything from it.

beatlesgirl25

I was thinking these boards would invite positive, insightful feedback and for some, it has. For others, I guess they feel the need to get a little "dig" in. From now on I would appreciate either an answer to my post or no post at all.

Did you just post this as your sig or are you quoting someone? If it's not a quote, then that's kind of a jerk thing to say to an entire board that you're asking for help from.

tlv204

They didn't charge you anything, but do you know without a doubt that they don't keep a small percentage of the gifts as a profit? They have to make money somehow, although I don't know 100% about AAA since they make money on the travel anyway.

Also, I can't believe there is a minimum gift/ "donation." That's silly.

duckie1905

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_honeymoon-registry-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:909b9a08-a56d-4b7c-bcde-3ea55fb8b72dPost:3e15c010-e9c9-4ae8-a3b7-20c44912dbd7">Re: Honeymoon Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]I can't believe how many people think honeymoon registries are "tacky". I just didn't know if there was a "better" way to go about it. AAA isn't charging us anything to have the registry so we aren't losing anything from it.
Posted by hfleet823[/QUOTE]

<div>In case you didn't notice, the existence of your HM registry wasn't the only thing people find horrible.  The fact that you want to mail them out to your guests in an attempt to solicit money to pay for a trip that you can't afford ranks right up there.</div><div>
</div><div>Oh, loooove your siggy.  Nothing like being upset because someone told you the truth and popped your pretty princess bubble.</div>

mwhitson14

I was thinking these boards would invite positive, insightful feedback and for some, it has. For others, I guess they feel the need to get a little "dig" in. From now on I would appreciate either an answer to my post or no post at all.

Has this been there the whole time?

tlv204

We did answer.  The answer is no, you should not send those out.

PS- We have insurance through AAA. I'm seriously reconsidering this just because they OFFER a honeymoon registry. Too bad it saves us enough money to make up for the faux pas I guess.

beatlesgirl25

Jinx whit. I was wondering the same thing. It sounds familiar, but I suppose at some point all the whining does, and there's no quote.

lyndausvi

I'm sorry you feel we are being mean.  That was not my intention.

But think about it.... How would you feel if you recieved information on how to give a gift to an event you have not even received and invite to the party yet? 

mwhitson14

It does sound really familiar BG. I can't figure it out.

tlv204

What if someone can't afford to give you a gift, then gets that piece of crap in the  mail, and feels even worse about it than they already did?  Do you want to be the reason people feel like assholes for not being rich? I'm assuming them getting a gift for you or not has no effect on your friendship, hopefully.

That's kind of extreme, but regardless, that's why no one should out those stupid registry cards out, even for regular registries.

MyNameIsNot

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_honeymoon-registry-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:909b9a08-a56d-4b7c-bcde-3ea55fb8b72dPost:3e15c010-e9c9-4ae8-a3b7-20c44912dbd7">Re: Honeymoon Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]I can't believe how many people think honeymoon registries are "tacky". I just didn't know if there was a "better" way to go about it. AAA isn't charging us anything to have the registry so we aren't losing anything from it.
Posted by hfleet823[/QUOTE]

Yes, the better way to go about it is to pay for your own honeymoon.  Asking for cash is bad.

ExpatPumpkin

Okay, I'll take a stab at this:

Most people think HM registries are tacky

BUT, you've already done it, so that brings us to:

It's rude to include any registry info in an invite

SO:

Mailing out registry cards - in an invite or separately - would be VERY RUDE.  So would openly soliciting gifts/money in any way...

THEREFORE:

Don't do it.

mwhitson14

Just figured it out, betrothed's siggy:

I am no fool. I was thinking this board would invite positive, insightful feedback - for some, it has. For others, I guess they feel the need to get a little "dig" in; that is not the purpose. From now on I would appreciate either an answer to my post or no post at all. Just my request.~le12ahw