Wedding Etiquette Forum

etiquette disagreements-thoughts?

My mom and I have some differing opinions on what the proper etiquette is in these situations:1. We have relatives in Europe. I am sending most of them courtesy invites, the same ones I am sending to everyone else. I do not think any of them will come, but I am inviting nevertheless. My mom thinks I should send an announcement saying I am getting married, but not an invite (as in, no area to reply because they have not been technically invited)...what should I do?2. My mom says she wants to sit at the wedding party table at the reception. We are having just a table for DH and I, and our wedding party will sit with their guest. My mom does not know where she is supposed to sit, and I told her she can just make up her own table and choose who she would like to sit with her (she is divorced and her second husband just died of cancer so she will probably be alone)3. My mom says that she will only financially contribute at the end of the wedding...is this normal? I know she would like to contribute, but she likes to have control of the situation and she won't pay for anything she does not herself like (example: if I chose flowers she does not like, she will not pay for them etc...). I tried to explain that I need to know what she plans to contribute to make a budget, but she says she will decide at the end. I certainly don't expect her to contribute anything at all, but if she would like to, is it unreasonable of me to ask her the amount before the wedding?4. My mom says that since a lot less people from my side are coming to the wedding, that she should not have to contribute as much as DH's parents for the wedding...is it generally divided a certain way? We are also going to pay for a portion of the wedding...is there etiquette about how it ideally should be divided?thank you :)
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