Wedding Etiquette Forum

+1 for MoH

My Fi and I set out from the very beginning that we were not going to allow +1 unless we knew both people in the couple. Or at the very least had met both. My MoH is my Fi's younger sister. She texts me asking if she can bring a date. I did not know that she was even dating someone but apparently she has for about two months. I simply text back "No. We already have the guestlist set." and because we don't know him and we are trying to minimize the number of guests that we don't know. She simple texts back "Ok."

A couple weeks later, my Future father-in-law (who spoils her rotten) goes behind my back to ask my parents if she can have a date after I've already told her no. So now I'm sitting here being pressured by my future father-in-law through my parents to allow her to bring her 2 month long BF who I don't even know his name.

I'm more mad about people going behind my back after I've already made a decission. Am I being unreasonable?

Re: +1 for MoH

  • OOOOHNOOOOOEEEEEEEEZZZZZ. 

    See my reply a few down from this one. 
  • A lot of people do think it is unreasonable not to allow your WP to bring dates.  (FYI, if there is anybody on your guest list who is in a long term relationship, then it is definitely unreasonable for you not to invite the SO just because you and your FI haven't met him/her.)
    Married 10/2/10
  • 1) she's your MOH, let her have a date
    b) she's your FSIL, let her have a date
    apple) she is officially dating him.  you can't split them up.  i bet if 2 months into you and your FI's relationship if no one and-guested you guys you'd have been a little crusty about it.

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  • It is a bit unreasonable to assume you will know everyone's dates personally. I mean, I personally can't say I've met all my co-workers spouses, let alone their boyfriends and girlfriends.

    You have until the date of your wedding to meet your fiance's sister's boyfriend. Good luck!
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_1-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:96ce9ac8-5f13-48bc-9e62-e90a0f714b7bPost:d5c9cc74-415e-4722-a959-6b15deb72a2e">Re: +1 for MoH</a>:
    [QUOTE]1) she's your MOH, let her have a date b) she's your FSIL, let her have a date apple) she is officially dating him.  you can't split them up.  i bet if 2 months into you and your FI's relationship if no one and-guested you guys you'd have been a little crusty about it.
    Posted by mandysmear[/QUOTE]

    This. All of this.

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.
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    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
  • I'm going throught this as a MOH and I'm not allowed to bring a date....whether there seriously dating....I'd at least make it an option....I'm not sure about her butI'm putting out alot of money to be a part of the wedding party so being told I can't bring a date is tacky and offensive
  • I'm just wondering OP, do you read?  Because this issue was absolutely addressed already. 
  • Wouldn't it be funny if Chloe was OP's MOH?  
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  • Serious couples should always be invited together. Two months, not that serious so your choice here. Now she is family and WP so i personally would give her a plus one.

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  • lharri12lharri12 member
    500 Comments
    edited July 2010
    IMO, the wedding party should always be allowed to bring dates.
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  • How do you not give your best friend/sister/cousin whoever a plus one? This just boggles my mind.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_1-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:96ce9ac8-5f13-48bc-9e62-e90a0f714b7bPost:c6a5fbc4-523c-4420-b8bd-189588b62c29">Re: +1 for MoH</a>:
    [QUOTE]Wouldn't it be funny if Chloe was OP's MOH?  
    Posted by andy71781[/QUOTE]
    When i first read the OP's post, I thought ti was MUD. I mean, the two threads were made right after each other, lol.
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  • You see your guests for what 5 mins at the reception. Why do you want them to not have a date ie someone to dance with etc.?
  • Shes in your WP and your MOH on top of that, she should def. be allowed a date
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  • I can't see NOT giving your MOH/FSIL a date.  I am also of the mind-set that all the single guests get a plus one because a) I wouldn't want to go to a wedding alone if I was single and b)  who am I to judge how serious a relationship is.  My personal feelings about guests aside, she is your MOH, probably greatly helped you along the way, she deserves to bring a date.  This is the stuff that bad blood and family fuels are made of.
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