FFF

ac_in_dc

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:650e2ee5-792e-4d50-9460-df395306434d">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I didn't see this, but I think her SN inspiration was Fight Club, which makes it kind of funny to me.
Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]

Oh shiit, you're right. That's hilarious.

kate51485

The new person Sweetpea is not my favorite.

NuggetBrain

I use the phrase "colored people time".  So does my mom.  And my grandma.  And my brother.  And most black folks I know. 

salt78

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:92f0897b-3e5f-40ab-a363-784773bc6bf4">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]The new person Sweetpea is not my favorite.
Posted by kate51485[/QUOTE]

<div>Uggg ditto this.</div>

Nebb

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:92f0897b-3e5f-40ab-a363-784773bc6bf4">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]The new person Sweetpea is not my favorite.
Posted by kate51485[/QUOTE]
I think shes nice enough but trying too hard. This probably sounds insensitive too, but while I know whats going on with her FI sucks im tired of hearing about his lungs everyday.

sarabellam

RE: the CPT reference - I had heard it a few years ago when I was castigating a student for being late (again) to my class. He referred to it as CPT, and had to define it for me. So the phrase is used in the States.

jasmineh7777

I missed the lynda thread. What does "colored people time" mean?

emilyinchile

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:2b541e8f-8d5f-40ba-9caa-c6b3f05eaab1">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]I use the phrase "colored people time".  So does my mom.  And my grandma.  And my brother.  And most black folks I know. 
Posted by NuggetBrain[/QUOTE]

Maybe I am just an oversensitive white person, but to me it seems like one of those things you can only say if you're black.

salt78

Oh and I forgot to add...Raptor Jesus is my homeboy.

jasmineh7777

People here say "native time" if they are Native American. Not being Native, I would never say it.

scoetto

A friend of mine got a watch tattooed on his left wrist. It has a "N" in the middle instead of a clock. He says the "N" stand for Negro Time. Because he's always late. (He's African American/Puerto Rican).   

sarabellam

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:1fbf0420-5de7-46ba-8cc4-697d2ae6dd43">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Maybe I am just an oversensitive white person, but to me it seems like one of those things you can only say if you're black.
Posted by emilyinchile[/QUOTE]

Kinda like rappers can call each other the "N" word all the time, but don't let that word come out of the mouth of someone who looks like me.

ac_in_dc

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:6d26b3fd-185c-4840-96ce-d469d732e7c8">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]People here say "native time" if they are Native American. Not being Native, I would never say it.
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]

This, plus (and I hate to flame poor lynda more for this) what was weird about it wasn't just like she said it to Nugget or someone she already knew or was friends with. It was a new poster she had never talked to before and she saw that she was black from her siggy pic and said "well, since you're black..."  Most people will react negatively when the first thing you notice about them/remark about is their race.

shellydiane820

I must live under a rock, I've never heard the phrase "colored people time".

squirrly

I don't care who you are or where you live - I think making comments that are based on race are inappropriate. 

Island Time I have no problem with.  Sorority time - no problem.  Anything to do with race - I have a problem with.  Where you live and what you're a member of are choices you make, and could change if you wanted to.  Your race isn't. 

kate51485

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:864ee975-6a89-4af4-9670-2bb0132b028f">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Kinda like rappers can call each other the "N" word all the time, but don't let that word come out of the mouth of someone who looks like me.
Posted by sarabellam[/QUOTE]

This.  My take on it is, if you don't want someone who is not part of your in-crowd to say it, do not let those who <em>are</em> in the crowd say it to you publicly.  (Or at all, but in public would be a good place to start.)

ac_in_dc

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:ece15ead-4e7c-406e-a622-cf61462fcaa0">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]Where you live and what you're a member of are choices you make, and could change if you wanted to.  Your race isn't. 
Posted by squirrly[/QUOTE]

Well, actually (and this isn't the place for this discussion probably) that's not completely true. And it will become less true as the population of mixed-race folks increases in this country.  Race is a lot of times much more about culture than about how someone looks...sometimes people will make judgements on your race that are unavoidable based on skin color, etc. But a lot of times it's about a culture you choose to identify with.

My grandma was half navajo, was abandoned by her mom at the age of 5, left NM in her 20s and never looked back. There's nothing "Indian" about my grandma or my dad. I don't think this assimilation was necessarily a good thing, but it is what it is. And technically I could probably track down my roots and apply for some kind of tribal benefits if I wanted, but that would be just plain silly.

And the genetic argument doesn't hold up, either. A lot of white people actually have 50% or more of there genotype from Africa, and vice-versa.

AmoroAgain

Aaaand here goes FFF the way of others. lol

MissLeahM

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:6d26b3fd-185c-4840-96ce-d469d732e7c8">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]People here say "native time" if they are Native American. Not being Native, I would never say it.
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]

Its 'Indian time'. Get it right. :)

re: Raptor jesus, so changing my sig to a 'happy zombie jesus day' would be inappropriate?

NuggetBrain

Don't get me started on the "N" word.  It pisses me off just as much to hear black folks use it than it does white folks.  Adding an "a" to the end of it doesn't suddenly make it not a nasty, ugly racial slur.  I f*cking hate that word.

I'm only going to say this once, because I'm sure it will piss off a lot of people, but I think the concept of white guilt really isn't that far off.  I think a lot of white folks err heavily on the side of caution whenever it comes to race, and tend to get more offended and upset at percieved racial slurs, jokes, questions, ideas, or comments than most of the people who are of that race.  The reason, in my opinion, is that they don't want to be percieved as racist or bigoted even if they don't understand what the big deal is or exactly why they should be upset with it.  It doesn't help that some black folks feel perfectly okay using phrases and words that, when spoken by a white person, they suddenly find offensive or upsetting.  Bullsh*t.  If it's offensive coming from somebody else, then it's offensive period.  I never believed in the "adopting offensive words/phrases to make them our own."  Why the hell would you want to make a word that's offensive somehow accepted among the very people that it's intended to offend?  Stupid.  Stupidstupidstupid.

Perfect example is CPT - most of the black folks I know use that term.  If I heard a white person use it, I wouldn't get mad.  Hell, whenever I'm late my white friends will always be "Nugs is running on CPT today".  Then again, I'm the type to firmly believe that I can't use a word or phrase that is okay for me to use, but not for someone else to use.  If I say it, I'm giving you the okay to say it back to me.  That's the way it goes. 

AmoroAgain

Yes, but that's your friends saying it Nuggs.  Not random white's on the internet.  And, I agree with you to an extent about the white guilt.  But, that's why I make an effort to talk openly about this stuff.  Allen and I make Asian jokes all the time, and people are horrified that we do it.

Stackeye210

The only time I go by is hammer time, cuz I'm just too legit. 

arbolita

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:3724364f-ddf5-4029-ad26-0cdfa148b0c0">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Its 'Indian time'. Get it right. :) re: Raptor jesus, so changing my sig to a 'happy zombie jesus day' would be inappropriate?
Posted by MissLeahM[/QUOTE]
No, it would be awesome.  I love zombie Jesus.

scoetto

I don't get offended when people call me a Honkeyy. I actually laugh. We even nicknamed our cat that. Because he was White and his last name was White.

Stackeye210

Nuggs - you are my husband.  He feels the same exact way. 

sarabellam

Golf-clap, Nugget. Love it!

kate51485

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:51999edd-f121-41d2-b6de-b8292bf83bcb">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]The only time I go by is hammer time, cuz I'm just too legit. 
Posted by Stackeye210[/QUOTE]

<3

I'm not sure what I think about the concept of 'white guilt', but I suppose I'd rather people have <em>some </em>amount of caution versus not caring at all. 

NuggetBrain

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:2ed1d165-5b1c-48f9-868f-8e08a28997ba">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]Yes, but that's your friends saying it Nuggs.  Not random white's on the internet.  And, I agree with you to an extent about the white guilt.  But, that's why I make an effort to talk openly about this stuff.  Allen and I make Asian jokes all the time, and people are horrified that we do it.
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE]

And I agree with that - I would be a little put off if some random white guy approached me on the street and made a comment about CPT.  So I can't disagree that Lynda using it with some random new poster just because she's black is offputting.  But, if I use it in front of you, I'm not going to be mad if you use it in front of me, even if we aren't super good friends.  The minute it comes out of my mouth in front of you, I'm giving you the okay to say it back to me.  That's just they way I am.  And, I usually don't use certain phrases and term in the general public or outside of my friends.  Like CPT.  Only because then I'd have to explain what it means, and I'm too lazy to do that.

opalsky007

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:2ed1d165-5b1c-48f9-868f-8e08a28997ba">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]Yes, but that's your friends saying it Nuggs.  Not random white's on the internet.  And, I agree with you to an extent about the white guilt.  But, that's why I make an effort to talk openly about this stuff.  Allen and I make Asian jokes all the time, and people are horrified that we do it.
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE]

Speaking of which...every time you say "this made me raff!" I immediately want to post this, but can never decide whether you'd love it or call me racist.


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tidetravel

DH had never heard of CPT, either.  One of his coworkers used the term a few days ago and he asked me about it.  I told him it was like Michael time, only faster.