Lingerie Bachelorette Party?

chelseamb11

So the idea of a lingerie bachelorette party for me has come up and I'm not sure how I feel about it.  Are those tacky or accepted in the etiquette world?  I went to a bach party last summer where we were supposed to bring one pair of panties that fits our personality, but they made a game out of it.  We're having dinner at a restaurant and going to some bars, so I don't know that we'd be able to make a game out of it.

What does E think?

AllAboutTheBenjamin

What's a lingerie party?

bmoruzzi

I'd be embarrassed.

whitsy

My lingerie shower was separate from my bach party. It was just some friends of mine that hadn't been able to make it to the other showers, and I wasn't inviting to the bach party because it was a weekend in Nashville.

It was fun. We drank, had snacky foods, and laughed at me turning red opening the gifts

chelseamb11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_lingerie-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9c97c29f-62f9-47a5-b6f8-d5c91dc483c4Post:05dd8421-5226-4051-883c-f78378a9b587">Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party?</a>:
[QUOTE]What's a lingerie party?
Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

Basically a bach party where the invite says it's lingerie themed and something clever about giving me lingerie or something (along with my sizes).
Our cars would be in the parking lot of the restaurant, so the stuff could go there.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_lingerie-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9c97c29f-62f9-47a5-b6f8-d5c91dc483c4Post:b7bca0fa-9ab6-4025-927b-003da6ec4c0a">Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party? : Basically a bach party where the invite says it's lingerie themed and something clever about giving me lingerie or something (along with my sizes). Our cars would be in the parking lot of the restaurant, so the stuff could go there.
Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]


I don't think that sounds bad, then.  Sounds like fun, as long as you trust your friends to get you stuff you like :) The only problem with it I could see would be that it might be a little expensive, but that's only if people buy you really expensive lingerie, which they don't have to.  If you're up for it why not?

chelseamb11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_lingerie-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9c97c29f-62f9-47a5-b6f8-d5c91dc483c4Post:13b50985-4633-4be9-903d-281335261b48">Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't think they're anti-etiquette. But I would agree with doing it at a house before leaving for the festivities.  Most b-parties I've been to we've given lingerie or similar gifts to the bride.  Once, we did it at a restaurant and it was terrible. 
Posted by djhar[/QUOTE]

That was my thought too.  At a restaurant would be weird.  However this restaurant has a private room you can do parties in. I used to waitress there and I waitressed a passion party once.  It was mega awkward, especially when the lady joked she wanted to tip me with one of the door prizes.............

ErinG93

I went to one for a close friend. It was really fun, but we were all really close. I think it would be uncomfortable if you weren't very close with everyone there. We even had a competition/game with play-doh. Whoever made the best diick won. My MIL won, oddly enough. 

rebarobert2012

I think it just depends on what you are comfortable with.  Personally, I would love to have one, but it would probably be pretty awkward since both of my fiance's sisters are bridesmaids, and they probably wouldn't want to watch me open lingerie that I would be wearing in front of their brother!

K Byte

As long as you're comfortable with it, I don't think it's against etiquette. A lot of girls receive lingerie or gift cards to places like Victoria's Secret etc. for their b-parties.

LDYGTR13

Definitely do it in private, I think lingerie parties in public are icky. But they're fun! We had a blast at my MOH's party and it was really fun for everyone involved - but we're outrageous like that.

crfische

I'd hate it, personally, but if that's your thing, go for it.

If my friends threw me a lingerie shower, I'd think they lost their brains and forgot who I was. They must think this is something you would enjoy.

midgetthemighty

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_lingerie-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9c97c29f-62f9-47a5-b6f8-d5c91dc483c4Post:623390b5-b3ce-4b4c-84b8-28ec9fe1761b">Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party? : We were in the middle of the restaurant. It was a Saturday night and the male owner stood and stared.  And laughed. It was terrible! I was co-maid of honor, but that was one battle that I decided wasn't worth fighting with the other maid of honor.  <strong>Looking back, maybe the bride deserved it for cutting me out of her pictures for being fat. 
</strong>Posted by djhar[/QUOTE]

Are you kidding me? Who would do that to one of their "best friends?". You're beautiful, so there.

chelseamb11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_lingerie-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9c97c29f-62f9-47a5-b6f8-d5c91dc483c4Post:623390b5-b3ce-4b4c-84b8-28ec9fe1761b">Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party? : We were in the middle of the restaurant. It was a Saturday night and the male owner stood and stared.  And laughed. It was terrible! I was co-maid of honor, but that was one battle that I decided wasn't worth fighting with the other maid of honor.  Looking back, maybe the bride deserved it for <strong>cutting me out of her pictures for being fat. </strong>
Posted by djhar[/QUOTE]

um.. WHAT?!

midgetthemighty

Oh, and Chels. I would do that in private. I went to one early last year and people were actually very nice with their choices. They were cute and tasteful.

Kate61487

My bach had the underwear game you mentioned; it was fun :-)  We were in a private back room, so other than the waitress occassionally coming in it was private, which I think is important.  I had to guess which girl gave me each pair of underwear; if I guessed wrong I had to drink if I guessed right everyone else did.  My MOH also gave me a multi-part much more risque gift which was hysterically priceless. I don't embarass too easily, and the comments she put with each item (edible body paints, massage oils, a vibrating ring, etc.) had us all cracking up.

Etiquette-wise I think the biggest thing would be if you think it would make any of your guests SUPER uncomfortable. My b-party was all young 20-somethings; high school friends and sorority sisters.  No siblings, parents, or relatives of any kind for that matter.  As long as you think your friends would be comfortable I say go for it.

chelseamb11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_lingerie-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9c97c29f-62f9-47a5-b6f8-d5c91dc483c4Post:1d2cfbdf-ad46-4d0d-98ae-b7933c1da2be">Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party?</a>:
[QUOTE]My bach had the underwear game you mentioned; it was fun :-)  We were in a private back room, so other than the waitress occassionally coming in it was private, which I think is important. <strong> I had to guess which girl gave me each pair of underwear; if I guessed wrong I had to drink if I guessed right everyone else did. </strong> My MOH also gave me a multi-part much more risque gift which was hysterically priceless. I don't embarass too easily, and the comments she put with each item (edible body paints, massage oils, a vibrating ring, etc.) had us all cracking up. Etiquette-wise I think the biggest thing would be if you think it would make any of your guests SUPER uncomfortable. My b-party was all young 20-somethings; high school friends and sorority sisters.  No siblings, parents, or relatives of any kind for that matter.  As long as you think your friends would be comfortable I say go for it.
Posted by Kate61487[/QUOTE]

That was the game! it was really fun!  Then once yours were figured out, you had to wear them on your head until the end of the game. it got silly really fast.

My friends would all go for it, defnitely.  FI's sister is a BM, but I don't think it would bother her (her own mother gave her lingerie at her bach party haha).  If we do it though, definitely want that private room with a female waitress.

MyUserName1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_lingerie-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9c97c29f-62f9-47a5-b6f8-d5c91dc483c4Post:ae957ab7-b8af-4413-b937-6af406fbb9cc">Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party?</a>:
[QUOTE]Please don't ask guests to shell out for another gift.  They're probably purchased shower and wedding gifts already. The B-Party is itself the gift.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

<div>She's not doing the asking...</div>

whitsy

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_lingerie-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9c97c29f-62f9-47a5-b6f8-d5c91dc483c4Post:ae957ab7-b8af-4413-b937-6af406fbb9cc">Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party?</a>:
[QUOTE]Please don't ask guests to shell out for another gift.  They're probably purchased shower and wedding gifts already. The B-Party is itself the gift.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

The guests at my lingerie shower were not invited to any other shower, so this was their shower gift. And now thinking about it, I didn't get a wedding gift from any of them, so I'm guessing they counted that as their wedding gift. Which totally works, and they only had to buy one gift.

musicalsunlight

A few of my friends got me some lingerie for my Bach party but we opened the gifts in the hotel room so no one random saw it. It was fun!

Simply Fated

I've never heard of a lingerie Bach party, but I've heard of lingerie themed bridal showers. I don't think they're against etiquette, unless you're in the middle if a restaurant or something. They're not really something I would like, but that game does sound like fun!

Jaridds68

I hadn't heard of this either...personally I'd be very embarassed to have a lingerie themed party in a restaurant or in private, but that's me.

If you know everyone in your group will be comfortable with the theme, go for it! But shiz could get real awkward if some of your friends don't embrace the party. Ditto the not in a restaurant as PP's have said.

Stina2012

I agree with Retread. If I'm already paying for your dinner and drinks out or for your beach weekend, don't make me shell out $60 more bucks for a Teddy! That being said, I think the underwear game is cheap and awesome.

RKPugs

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_lingerie-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9c97c29f-62f9-47a5-b6f8-d5c91dc483c4Post:13b50985-4633-4be9-903d-281335261b48">Re: Lingerie Bachelorette Party?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't think they're anti-etiquette. But I would agree with doing it at a house before leaving for the festivities.  Most b-parties I've been to we've given lingerie or similar gifts to the bride.  Once, we did it at a restaurant and it was terrible. 
Posted by djhar[/QUOTE]

<div> I really want one! I think they will be fun if someone offers. This said...please don't do it in public. One time my dad was visiting and we were in a restaurant sitting next to a bachelorette party. They not only had lingerie but various 'toys'. It was extremely embarrassing haha</div>

Viczaesar

I don't think bachelorette parties should be gift-giving events, so I'm not a fan of the idea.

Alaecia

My future mother in law wants to throw me one of these, along with my fiances sister in law. We all get along amazingly well! We plan on getting a hotel in Nashville and having just the wedding party and maybe a few other girlfriends come and have the Lingerie party at the hotel, then dressing up and walking downtown. I was thinking some karaoke in a few bars, but I dont want to get totally drunk in the bars, so I told them I'll drink a little when we are out, but when we get back to the hotel it will be HELLO mini bar! lol. I don't think they are strange at all. They are fun, and its interesting to see what people think you would be into in that department.