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Wedding Etiquette Forum

NWR- Baby Shower Question

I don't usually post here but you folks are usually solid on the advice.
I am cohosting a baby shower for my best friend with her mother and MIL.  MIL owns a small toy store and was insisting that I include a list of local retailers on the invite that she networks with, in spite of the fact that BFF and her H declined registries at those stores and are registered elsewhere.  They decided to register at one children's clothing store to appease her.  Today, I showed her a draft of the invite with both registries and she responded that I had forgotten to include her store.  I said that I didn't realize that they had a registry through her store and she said that they don't yet but to include it and she would make them do it. 
I hardcore side-eye the idea of her making money off of her grandchild AND a shower that she is co-hosting and feel like this is a major etiquette breach.  I know that BFF and H don't want to register there and have told her as much.  How do I politely tell her that this is not okay?

Re: NWR- Baby Shower Question

  • tough place to be in....because you are cohosting.  I would side eye that too, especially since your friend said they are not registering there. 

    Give it a day or two and then maybe contact the MIL and say your friend had mentioned she wasn't registering there.
  • What does her mother think about this? Is she on Team Norman74 or Team MIL? because if she sides with you, you might have some help there. But if you are outnumbered, that could severely suck.

    You could try explaining to her that this is a baby shower, not a chance at free advertising.
    "MIL, my friend has expressed which stores she would like to have mentioned on her invitation. I'm sorry, but these other stores will not be mentioned on these invitations."

    she said that they don't yet but to include it and she would make them do it.

    If she does this, you need to come back and tell us what your friend said. If your friend DOES register at those places, then this is all moot.

    Her MIL is taking advantage of the situation to create business buzz. Not cool.
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  • I would just respond with a cheerful "As soon as (friend) let's me know they registered there, we'll get the info out to the invitees!"

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    Everything the light touches is my kingdom.
  • What J&K said.
  • Eew eww eww!  So tacky!  That lady needs to find other ways to advertise her business.  I cannot believe she would go that far to make a few bucks.  I would have your friend tell her MIL that she is not registering at her store so it is not going in the invite.
  • RaptorSLHRaptorSLH member
    500 Comments First Anniversary
    edited January 2012
    Yeah, no.  If I were a guest and found out what she was doing, not only would I not purchase my gift at her store, or any of her "networked" stores, but you can bet I would tell all my friends and family to stay away from a store with such sleazy management.

    As far as what you should say, I agree with J&K. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Does your friend know about the shower or is it a surprise? I had ettique issues with my friend's mother when I was co-hosting my friend's baby shower. When it came to pissing off her mom, my stomach was in knots, so I discussed it with my friend. She understood exactly what was going on and we handled the situation together.

    I understand not wanting to bother your preggers friend! and there might be some ettique about bringing these issues to them, so use caution. My friend was more like a sister and her mother had always been a second mom to me so it was easier to go to her and tell her what was up and plan how to tip-toe through the problem.
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