RSVP extra +1

mnols

So we only added +1s on the invitations for those in serious relationships. When we found out one of my somewhat distant cousins has a boyfriend of 1 year plus (first we heard of him) I sent her a note saying he was welcome to come. But now I have another cousin who added a plus one to hers, and I think it might just be for a friend that will be in town the same time as her? How do I address this?

If we don't have too many, do I just let it slide, or do I have to address so that those showing up without guests don't think we gave her special treatment?

Want to avoid drama as much as possible. Thanks!

jessicabessica

Once you get RSVPs back, it's fine to call people that added plus ones (not significant others) and let them know that the invitation was just for them.  I think it's fine if you want to let it slide, though.  I doubt that guests that followed the no plus one rule are going to go up to your cousin and demand proof that she is romantically involved with her plus one. 

ETA: I guess if it's a situation where all the cousins live in the same area (or at least are all in town or all out of town in relation to the wedding) and know who's in a relationship and who's not, you might want to not let one bring a plus one if none of the others can.  Some people might create drama over that, some wouldn't--you know your family and guests.

mnols

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_rsvp-extra-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a36b304d-66a3-4ca1-9854-bc617ae8df4bPost:88a3863d-9974-4ed1-b390-375ae9bb82d2">Re: RSVP extra +1</a>:
[QUOTE]So people is serious relationships should be invited, with their partner, by name on the invitation. That ship has sailed, but it is the cause of the confusion. If it is just the other cousin, I would let it slide.
Posted by Liatris2010[/QUOTE]



sorry, should have clarified. We did spell out names of any significant others. Her invitation had just her name on inner and outer envelope.

Is it rude if I email her and ask her for the name of her guest for placecards, etc.?

jessicabessica

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_rsvp-extra-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a36b304d-66a3-4ca1-9854-bc617ae8df4bPost:9634af3b-5402-4c34-a85e-6202ca72fe41">Re: RSVP extra +1</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: RSVP extra +1 : sorry, should have clarified. We did spell out names of any significant others. Her invitation had just her name on inner and outer envelope. Is it rude if I email her and ask her for the name of her guest for placecards, etc.?
Posted by mnols[/QUOTE]

<div>Not rude, you should definitely try to get her guest's name.  </div>