Short cocktail hour with no apps?

Themis278

Long and short of it. Our friends and fam have a tendency to have a few to many during the traditional catholic wedding gap, don't eat the apps and and before you know it everyone is feeling mighty happy during dinner.

Our reception is starting at 6 and since the timing works that we will actually be there for all of it (not using that time for photos) we are considering having just a 1/2 hr of open bar with no apps with a receiving line (basically "Hi fabulous to have, grab a drink and we'll get started soon" type of thing) and start dinner at 6:30.

I should say that the plan is a second round of food (late night drinking food) will be served around 10:30-11. This has become VERY popular with our friends and fam - they are the types to close out weddings and bars so late night munchies go over very well. But we can't afford to basically have 2 cocktail hours, and the late night munchies is what we want as guests normally and is more of our personality.

Julz629

I would recommend having some kind of appetizer if you are serving drinks since I'm sure many people will be on empty stomachs at that time of day.  I don't think it has to be anything fancy like passed appetizers or stations -- how about a veggie or cheese tray?

Calumet

Personally I think that is fine, but it would be nice if you could have a little crudites: veggies, cheeses, fruit, breads... At our place this was really affordable, and it was all we had during our shortened cocktail hour.

Themis278

I forgot to include one part, our aunts and uncles all go out for apps and drinks between the ceremony and reception. Its just kinda one of those thigns they all do... hence the generally having too much to drink before we get there.

If we have the extra money before the wedding, it is one of the #1 things that we would add ( a simple veggie/cheese setup) but if we get down to the wire is this really the worse thing?

PharmacyBride

I think you should have something served if you have a gap- I just think it is better for guests (not many eat during the gap).  I think cutting down your cocktail hour is a great way to prevent over drinking and it might be ok to not serve apps since dinner will start right away.

I wouldn't advise cutting your cocktail hour completely- because it is a good opportunity for people to socialize and grab a drink before dinner.  Your idea to have it for 1/2 hour seems great!

apple_green

I agree with PP that you should have something small... cheese & crackers or something.

Themis278

I just priced out what a veggie and cheese table would cost us and let me say .... yeah it costs a lot more then I thought.

So the votes seem to be if we can afford it we should but since it will be a short cocktail hour 1/2 hour, it wouldn't be the end of the world or considered unforgivenably rude?

danieliza1127

I don't think it's a cocktail hour at all.  The reception starts at 6, dinner will be served about 6:30.  That's perfectly normal.  Around here, that's how receptions go.  You show up, get a drink, mill around, find your seats, and chit chat until the big introduction and then things get going. 

chigirl2010

We're doing the same; I don't see the point of appetizers for the 20-30 mins between ceremony and dinner. Like a PP said, it's practically not even a real cocktail hour but a transition period during which the bar is open lol. Guests will be finding their seats, setting down their things, greeting long-seen family members, etc. Before we know it, dinner will be out.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

I'd probably prefer the late night snack in this instance than the cocktail hour. As long as you have food at two different times and the first round (dinner, in this case) is served soon after guests arrive, I don't think it will be a problem.

How long is your gap?

Beachy730

What time will dinner be served?  I would go for cheese and crackers if you can if dinner will be served anytime later than 6:30.  Our cocktail hour started at 6, and dinner wasn't served until 7:30.  We had cheese and crackers, bruschetta, and 2 other appetizers. 

I know its unfortunate if people get too drunk at your wedding, but its really not something you can control or should worry about.  Our friends are big drinkers, and we also had about 2 hours between when the ceremony ended and cocktail hour began because of the Catholic church times.  One group of our friends went and checked into the hotel, and brought beer and liquor there to drink before, and another group went to a bar next to the reception place and drank there.  Were they hammered?  Probably.  Did they cause any scenes?  Nope.  Did it at all take away from our day?  Nope. 

Try not to make any decisions based on a group of people at your wedding.  I know when I go to a wedding, I go hungry expecting there to be appetizers.  So there's a good chance a lot of people at your wedding will be doing the same.  If your dinner is going to be served at 6:30 or 7 then I think you would be okay without them.  Just think about all of your guests.  If you know your crowd, which is sounds like you do, and you think they would all rather prefer late night snacks, then go with that.  Just don't stress yourself out over how much people drink or how drunk they get.  I could get just as drunk after dinner as I could before. 

squirrly

Are you having a gap?  You said you don't need the CH for pictures, so I'm guessing so.  Is there any way you can host the CH during the gap, instead?  Even if it's just cheese, crackers, snack mix, etc. and beer/wine, then your guests wouldn't have to go treat themselves.

Themis278

Ok I get the whole cheese and cracker thing but to put it into presepctive our place doesn't offer a smaller package - cheese,crackers, veggies and fruit (this is the small option) is going to cost us around $900 - no joke!. Hense if things don't come up the week before we might be good and we could add it but its nothing we can bank on right now.

Our gap is about 3 hours, the church, hotel where everyone is staying, and the reception is all within 3 blocks of each other less then 5 minute walk. We are asking a portion of our family to stay an extra 30 minutes at the Church to do a large family picture, and we are asking a few friends to meet us at the building next door where we are doing pictures right before the reception to make sure we don't miss those shots.

Dinner is scheduled to start at 6:30 right now.

Themis278

squirrly - we couldn't afford to host anything that long the gap is 3 hours and 8 hr reception. The gap is common in our group, so this is completely normal, people would probably be stunned if we could afford that. Most of the time our familes do a late big breakfast, then they grab a late lunch or apps and drinks during the gap change outfits into the little black dresses, and then join back up for the reception.


correct 5 hr reception if we tried to host that it would be an 8hr reception ... little typo!

danieliza1127

I think it's perfectly fine to have the reception start at 6 and dinner served at 6:30 with no appetizers.  That's pretty much every wedding I've ever been to.

tenofcups4me

I'd miss the hors d'oeuvres because that's typically my favorite part of a wedding :-) But I don't think there's anything wrong with what you're planning. What you're describing is really more just the beginning of the party than a cocktail hour per se -- people come in, say hello, get a drink, find their seats and by then it's dinner time. So I don't think hors d'oeuvres are necessary in that scenario.

marisah83

I think that if people are arriving to the reception at 6 and food is served at 6:30, there is no need for appetizers.  That will give everyone time to say hello to you and grab a drink.

Beachy730

If you stick with the 6:30 dinner than no you don't need any appetizers.  Like PP's said, they will come in, get a drink and mingle, and find their seats probably.  I also look forward to the appetizers more than the dinner, but you're fine without them if you stick with the game plan you have now.

Themis278

Thanks for confirming my thoughts. I love apps too when its done right unfortunatly we had to make a choice and the guest list won out over the little stuff. Dinner will be amazing