But its on my birthday!

wadergirl

So... some friends of me and my b/f are getting married... on my birthday.

Now, normally this wouldn't be a problem, I'd skip a birthday to go to a wedding.

This year, though, its 10/10/10.  Its not really a special year for me (26), but the date is special (heck, thats why they chose it).  I had already started planning a big birthday bash for myself.  I'm so torn.  I'm don't want to steal their thunder and just have my birthday at their reception or something (how rude would that be!???), but I don't want to have it somewhere else and make our many many mutual friends choose either.

opalsky007

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-its-birthday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a5d26733-0483-4c95-9518-580453206f71Post:16fd5db0-a067-4f09-9744-66a1a340332e">But its on my birthday!</a>:
[QUOTE]So... some friends of me and my b/f are getting married... on my birthday. Now, normally this wouldn't be a problem, I'd skip a birthday to go to a wedding. This year, though, its 10/10/10.  Its not really a special year for me (26), but the date is special (heck, thats why they chose it).  I had already started planning a big birthday bash for myself.  I'm so torn.  I'm don't want to steal their thunder and just have my birthday at their reception or something (how rude would that be!???), but I don't want to have it somewhere else and make our many many mutual friends choose either.
Posted by wadergirl[/QUOTE]

You can have the party another day, if it's important to you to have a big bash. I can't remember the last time I celebrated my birthday on my actual birthday. Life gets in the way sometimes.

AdeleDazeem

Ummmm... just celebrate a different day.

PS - I would choose the wedding over your birthday party.  Sorry if that sucks, but it's the truth.

ehathewa

I just went to a wedding on my birthday this year.  It was nice.  I got to dance and have cake... I can't think of many better ways to celebrate. 

I would also choose attending a wedding over a birthday party.  A wedding is a once in a lifetime event.  You have a birthday every year. 

munkeybutz04

have your party the next day.  your friends getting married will appreciate that you didnt have your birthday party "at" their reception, and your mutual friend wont have to choose, but they will already be in town.  it shouldnt be a big deal, even though the date is cool, its a birthday and you'll have plenty more.

 their wedding is definitely something that should be celebrated...I can imagine you want to go to their wedding also, right?

FutureMrsTR

I've already dealt with one entitled-birthday chick this weekend, two is too much.  Celebrate on a different day, you'll live.  And besides, you'd probably be disappointed because people would go to the wedding instead of your birthday party.

rbtrumpet

My birthday is 10/10/10 too!

I understand how you feel - FI's really close friend from middle school was planning on getting married on that day. (I'm secretly VERY happy that she chose 10/17/10!)

However, like other's said, weddings come first.  DO NOT have a "party" at her reception - that is incredibly rude! 

When FI's friend had her wedding scheduled that day, I was planning on going out for a special lunch before the wedding with FI, and then (maybe) doing other celebrations with friends on a different day. (but I'm not a big "birthday-party" type person, so I probably would have only done the special brunch w/ FI)

L-Bride

I think you would be the one bummed out because people are most likely going to choose a their friend's wedding over their friend's 26th birthday.
I suggest having it a different day.

baystateapple

Weddings > birthdays.  I'm sorry, but I'd reschedule your party.  Most of your friends are going to go to the wedding.

loop0406

To me, it doesn't matter if you turn 25, 30, 40 or 50, you should celebrate on another day because wedding comes 1st, they can't change their 'celebration' date as easily as you...

Loopyseven

We usually go out to dinner with friends for birthdays - on a Friday or Saturday night that is the weekend before or after... Don't try to compete with your friends' wedding.  You will lose.

wadergirl

Well, the whole point was to have the party ON 10/10/10 because it was the DATE that was important.  Yeah, I'll have a birthday next year, but it won't be 10/10/10 anymore.

In any case though, I like rbtrumpets suggestion of a lunch... though I don't know WHEN the wedding will be yet, we might be able to figure out a brunch/lunch/late-party-at-the-now-smoke-free-bars.

andy71781

Dude my bestie is having her THIRTIETH birthday on my wedding day. She hasn't made a peep about it because (1) she gets to be with all of her closest friends and (2) she's an adult.

Her reward for being so awesome is a b-day cake. 

You don't need a b-day party the wedding day. Do it another day.

kristinanddan

The date 10/10/10 really isn't important, just like 9/9/09 wasn't. You might think it's cool, but important? Nope.

GreenPepperBurger

Wow. Really? I don't understand how the triple ten date somehow equates to you throwing a big birthday party for yourself. Yeah, it's a cool date, but you'll get over it.

Between this and your post on NEY, I'm starting to think you're just a troll.

georgia_bride09

You're super immature to be 26. Since when was a birthday, and a non-milestone one at that, more important than a wedding? Oh, that's right. Never.

I would pick a wedding over a birthday party 100% of the time.

As for you being worried about having your thuper thpecial birthday party on 10/10/10, well, all I have to say is it's time to grow up and be an adult.

wadergirl

Yay, ask for advice and now I'm a troll!  And you people wonder why folks think you're mean?

I was looking for a way to have a fun big day for myself, let my friends have the special day (that I could also go to because they are my friends) and not make the two clash, but all I get is ripped apart for it.

Night_Sprite

You're right.  The only solution is to make them change their wedding date which will happen once so they can attend your birthday party which will happen every year until you die.  

georgia_bride09

We told you how to not "make the two clash". Move your birthday party, which is by far the least important of the two events, to a different day.

GreenPepperBurger

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-its-birthday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a5d26733-0483-4c95-9518-580453206f71Post:f93ddd08-eda9-415d-8db8-2482e13cb461">Re: But its on my birthday!</a>:
[QUOTE]You're super immature to be 26. Since when was a birthday, and a non-milestone one at that, more important than a wedding? Oh, that's right. Never. I would pick a wedding over a birthday party 100% of the time. As for you being worried about having your<strong> thuper thpecial birthday party</strong> on 10/10/10, well, all I have to say is it's time to grow up and be an adult.
Posted by georgia_bride09[/QUOTE]


I literally LOLed.

And OP, when you post unbelievably ridiculous things such as the ones you do and then have the gall to ask for a certain type of advice, then yes, I think we are entitled to be mean. Toodles!

Mrs.B6302007

WHy are you throwing your own birthday bash?

JoyTate1

10/10/10 is NO different from 10/11/10.  Something special will not happen, fireworks will not be displayed, the world will not stop.  Why?  Because it is just a date.  I don't get why it is cool, personally.  I don't get why you have to celebrate on that specific day.  I am not trying to rip you apart, but I really don't get it.  Anyone born after the 12 day of any month will never have a repeat date birthday.

wadergirl

Why am I throwing myself a party?  Because it would be fun.

I think you are all ridiculous to be so rude when someone is asking for advice on what to do before acting, I think you need to find someone to ask before you speak.

I'll leave this at thanking trumpet on this forum for her good advice, and Jeana on the NEY for her good advice, and leave the rest of you to be mean to each other.

"Toodles"

polichik

I don't understand the whole "date" thing. I mean, I guess I see how people could get excited about putting 10/10/10 on all their personalized wedding cocktail napkins, personalized wedding toilet paper, personalized etc. etc. etc., but a birthday party?

Apparently I just don't get it. I love birthdays as well, but I'm pretty sure I've never thrown myself a birthday party. That's what best friends and FIs are for.

mysticl

What's wrong with throwing yourself a b-day party?  I know lots of people who do it.  They don't expect gifts (if that is the hang up) they just want people to come and celebrate with them. 

L-Bride

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-its-birthday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a5d26733-0483-4c95-9518-580453206f71Post:cf4c0a4b-1bdd-44a5-9882-af456b37a582">Re: But its on my birthday!</a>:
[QUOTE]Why am I throwing myself a party?  Because it would be fun. Posted by wadergirl[/QUOTE]

Do you know what else is fun and is also <em>important? </em>A wedding! I find it hard to believe you're already planning your October birthday party in July anyways.

baystateapple

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-its-birthday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a5d26733-0483-4c95-9518-580453206f71Post:1733af45-6498-4ce9-bd9d-26c43e1f7cc1">Re: But its on my birthday!</a>:
[QUOTE]Well, the whole point was to have the party ON 10/10/10 because it was the DATE that was important.  Yeah, I'll have a birthday next year, but it won't be 10/10/10 anymore. In any case though, I like rbtrumpets suggestion of a lunch... though I don't know WHEN the wedding will be yet, we might be able to figure out a brunch/lunch/late-party-at-the-now-smoke-free-bars.
Posted by wadergirl[/QUOTE]

OMG, it's ONE DAY.  It's a freakin' DATE.  Whothefuckcares?

And I think your idea of planning a lunch/brunch party for yourself on their wedding day is pretty shitastic as well.  "Hey guys, we just went to a wedding, let's go to my birthday party, thrown by me, to celebrate me, and then go back and celebrate with the couple!"  It's only going to make you look like a spoiled brat. 

Either suck it up and change the date of your party, or throw yourself a huge birthday bash on 10/10/10, and celebrate by yourself, since everyone else you know will be at the wedding.  Sheesh.

polichik

Myticl, I don't think it's necessarily awful to throw your own birthday party, but I've always been uncomfortable with it. I love attention as much as the next person, but it seems so awkward to me to ask for people to come celebrate your existence annually.

I also see a difference between going "Hey, it's my birthday, let's all meet for dinner!' versus a "huge, blowout bash." JMO.

MISSCOURTNEY20

A 10.10.10 birthday is just as "important" as a 10.10.10 wedding. It sounds and looks cool. Ask the October brides. I am sure that is what they will say. I don't think there is anything wrong with OP wanting to have her party on her birthday this year. I do think that entertaining the thought of partying at her friend's reception was a little much though. Hopefully she enjoys her bday.

LesPaul

Your birthday will still be on 10/10, and you get to attend a wedding!  Move your bday party to another day and get over yourself.

L-Bride

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-its-birthday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a5d26733-0483-4c95-9518-580453206f71Post:2c328bc4-4e96-4f42-9b62-ede59df67477">Re: But its on my birthday!</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>A 10.10.10 birthday is just as "important" as a 10.10.10 wedding.</strong>It sounds and looks cool. Ask the October brides. I am sure that is what they will say. I don't think there is anything wrong with OP wanting to have her party on her birthday this year. I do think that entertaining the thought of partying at her friend's reception was a little much though. Hopefully she enjoys her bday.
Posted by MISSCOURTNEY20[/QUOTE]

Really? I completely disagree with this. I think birthdays are fun and important but if we are comparing them- weddings will always trump berfdays. Unless we are under the age of 10 that is.