Officiant issue

lmark7786

Ok, so we are trying to decide which officiant we want to marry us. We both belong to the same church, but do not care too much for our new pastor that started last summer. There is a pastor in our congregation that is retired, and we really like him a lot and would love to have him as our officiant.Would it be rude if we bypassed our active pastor and asked the retired pastor to be our officiant? I'm not sure how to approach this situation...Note: We are not getting married at our church, but at a chapel on a school's campus.

trix1223

Because you're not getting married in your church, I think it's easier.  We currently have a pastor in our Presbyterian church that our family doesn't care for.  However, we had a very long relationship with our former pastor.Because DD had an outdoor ceremony, there wasn't any issue at all with her having our dear former pastor perform the wedding. Check with someone in your church leadership to be sure, though.

britab

A lot of head pastors prefer another pastor does things like weddings. Ours suggested the youth or music pastor but we wanted the head one.

AwkOcto

initially I wanted to do this as well (before I changed my mind about being married in the Catholic Church) and I was able to request any pastor who was in the local diocese (in Illinois). I am unsure if there are different rules for your church/religion, but my home church OK'd it with us when we did want to go through with a different pastor.

peachkins

Definitely agree that this will far less awkward since you're not getting married in your church.  If he brings it up I would just tell the new pastor that you've decided to go with the retired one because you know and like him very well and it means a lot to have him do the ceremony.