Wedding Etiquette Forum
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who do I send the invite to?

First off, I know I am not geting married for a year and its to early for anything. I am just wondering.....
We have a lot of friends who are married, engaged, live together or have been together for ever but dont live together. I know that we will send 1 invite with both parties names on it to the couples that live together, but what about the couples that are a social unit, but live alone? Will I send them each an ivite or send one and put both names on it?
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Re: who do I send the invite to?

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    Send each an invite. Keep this in mind for budgetary reasons if you decide to order pricey invitations.
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    aragx6aragx6 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    I think it depends on if you're close friends with each or not. if you're close friends with a guy who has a serious girlfriend who you don't know that well you'd just send them one invitation
    Lizzie
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    We just sent it to one with both names on it.  We knew that we liked getting joint mail pre-wedding, so we figured our friends would too.
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    LuluP82LuluP82 member
    First Comment

    My calligrapher says toput the name of the friend on the outside and then of both on the inner for ppl who dont' live together but are in a relationship.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_send-invite-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ae944657-b07b-409b-9268-4062a790f0a1Post:0f3a470c-e2ea-4917-83c6-0492579cca28">Re: who do I send the invite to?</a>:
    [QUOTE]We just sent it to one with both names on it.  We knew that we liked getting joint mail pre-wedding, so we figured our friends would too.
    Posted by DramaGeek[/QUOTE]
    this exactly.
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    All couples only got one invite for ours, with both names on it.  I would think sending them each their own might really confuse the RSVP process; do they rsvp just for themselves, b/c their bf got an invite too?  would niether respond because they assume the other is taking care of it?

    Also consider if you would ACTUALLY want both at your wedding if they were to break up.  in some cases you would, but in others it's better to send the invite to the person that's truly your friend.  The s/o is named on the invite, so it's clear they're invited, but reduces confusion, just in case.
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    Send one invitation, addressed to both people.
    Choose the address based on who you are closer to. If that's not possible, ask them where they'd prefer to receive it.
    The person whose home it is gets their name on it first.
    BabyFruit Ticker Me: 37 DH: 40 Married: 7/31/2011 TTC since September 2011 BFP: Nov. 22, 2012 EDD: July 29, 2013
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    mica178mica178 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    From a proper etiquette standpoint, you should send the invitations to each person if they are not cohabitating.  Now if you're really only friends with one person in the couple (so if they broke up, only one person would truly be invited), you can send the invitation to that person but put both names on the envelop (no & in between their names since the & indicates marriage).
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    amys325amys325 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    Send it to the female with both names on it.....in my experience guys are terrible with invitations and RSVPs.  When my husband was living with 3 other guys, they all got invitations to the same wedding and all threw them out on accident.  We had NO idea what was going on for the wedding.
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