Wedding Etiquette Forum

Would this be considered a destination wedding?

So my family and my fiance's family live an hour and a half away from each other. I've picked a wedding venue in Ann Arbor that I truly love. It's basically right next door to myself and my FILs, but over an hour from my hometown. My mom thinks this will be off-putting to my side of the family and result in many not coming. She says that over an hour = destination wedding.

I don't really have a problem with it, considering there's so much to do in Ann Arbor. But, I was wondering if I should I include hotels, etc, in the invite for guest coming from my hometown? And is an hour too far to drive for a wedding?

The ceremony and reception are in the same place.

Re: Would this be considered a destination wedding?

  • I wouldn't consider that a destination wedding and wouldn't consider an hour too far to drive for a wedding. I received hotel info for a wedding that's 1.5 hrs from me, I just figured it went in everyone's invitations.
  • An hour isn't too far for a wedding.  It would still allow people to drive home at the end of the night if they wish.  As a courtesy, I would include some hotel options for guests.  It may not be necessary to have a hotel block, but that is also something you could look into.

    Your mom just may be put off a little bit that the wedding isn't in your hometown.  But what you are doing is fine and you should continue on with your plans.
  • I think it's fine. Goodness, I drive an hour to go to lunch sometimes if I'm really craving something ... No biggie to drive that far for a wedding!
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  • I do not call a wedding an hour from home a DW.  

    I do, however feel it can be a little annoying for some guests.  Too close to get a room, too far that stay late, etc. 

    Not that I would change anything nor would it stop me from attending.    It would not stop anyone I know from attending either.

    Yes, I would include hotels information to ALL guests.  They can decide for themselves what they want to do.  

    Personally I would stay at one because DH and I like to drink at weddings. 






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • I drive an hour to WORK.

    Driving an hour to a wedding is nothing, an dyour mom is being silly.

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    Everything the light touches is my kingdom.
  • Ditto on driving an hour one way to work. I wouldn't give a second thought to driving that for a wedding.

    I would include hotel info for everyone. I would probably drive up to 1.5 hours without getting a hotel room, unless it was a wedding where H and I both planned on drinking heavily. Probably wouldn't get one for an hour's drive, but you never know. If they don't want a hotel, they can just disregard that info.


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  • I think your mom is just making an excuse to try to convince you to move your wedding to her.  An hour is definitely not a destination.  Ours was two hours away from us becasuse we're assholes.
  • Ditto PP's as 1 hour does not = a destination wedding.

    But I was more struck by the fact that I would assume the point of reference should probably be from where you live, not where your parents live, to determine whether it should be considered a destination wedding. 

    I have a friend who got married in Iowa where they live, but the majority of our friends and we had to travel from Minneapolis.  Um...that's not a destination wedding.  That's just a wedding that's in the town where the couple lives. 

  • Pet peeve of mine - no, this is not a destination wedding.  I'm currently in Puerto Rico for a wedding of friends who live on the East Coast of the US.  THAT'S a desitnation wedding.  My husband and I married in Bermuda when everyone traveled from the Northeastern US and needed passports.  THAT'S a destination wedding.

    One hour?  That's just a plain old wedding.  It's also quite normal.
  • Definitely not a destination wedding.  A DW, in my opinion, absolutely includes a flight.  And frankly if half your guest list lives where you're having the wedding it's still not a DW, even if it was a 2 hour flight from your parents.

    A 1.5 hour drive is no big deal; its how far we are from my parents and we make day trips on the weekend frequently.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-this-be-considered-a-destination-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:af57bbb9-52ae-491c-ac7f-e7336547f124Post:932a0158-4d8e-41f9-a43a-02757a851ff8">Re: Would this be considered a destination wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I drive an hour to WORK. Driving an hour to a wedding is nothing, an dyour mom is being silly.
    Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

    Yep, hour each way to work here too. If you're having a destination wedding, then I'm traveling for work. Actually, in that case the company has to pay me more. Hmmm....

    Nah, you're fine. The hotel info is nice just in case someone wants to stay, but many will just drive home at the end of the night.
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  • Most of my dad's side of the family lives 70 miles away from my parents, but it can take up to 90 minutes to get there depending on traffic.  They've come out for all of our graduations and two weddings and not once complained.  None of them are huge partiers, so they left anywhere between not lbefore long after the special dances (my grandfather and whomever he was riding with) to maybe an hour before the end of the reception.
  • Haha, thank you all. My fiance is in the military, so I don't really "live" anywhere in particular at the moment. Still waiting on him to return home. I'm between the Ann Arbor area and my hometown quite often, which is why the drive seems like nothing to me.

    I am sticking with the venue and calling her out. I'm honestly thinking that she's just trying to pressure me into having the venue closer to home.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-this-be-considered-a-destination-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:af57bbb9-52ae-491c-ac7f-e7336547f124Post:932a0158-4d8e-41f9-a43a-02757a851ff8">Re: Would this be considered a destination wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I drive an hour to WORK. Driving an hour to a wedding is nothing, an dyour mom is being silly.
    Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

    This.

    Maybe next time I go visit my friends on the other side of the city, I'll pack an overnight bag...

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
  • agreed - an hour away isn't far.  we've having our wedding about 1.5 hours away from where we live ( and most of my family is flying in from out of town - while his lives in the area...and is driving the 1.5 hrs)  We have accomodation blocks set up for everyone -and most people even local are looking at staying at a hotel, just so they dont have to drive all the way home since they will be drinking.
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