I could cry right now. One of my best friends is getting married in July and when she got engaged (in March of last year) she asked me to be a bridesmaid. She also asked if my DD would be one of her flower girls. Of course I said yes and have gone to her ridiculous "pre-wedding planning events" and tried in dresses 3 times and paid for my dress and was planning on buying my DD's next week.
Well, I share custody with my XH and since the wedding (still months away) falls on a day when DD would be with him, I asked him last night if we could rearrange things just for that day for the wedding thinking it would be no big deal (we make small changes all the time to accommodate each other and neither of us has ever said no to any reasonable request).
Turns out the wedding falls the same week as his baby daughter's first birthday (a birthday that didn't exist when my DD was asked to be a FG and that I haven't thought about for even a second since the baby was born) and the wedding may be the same day as her birthday party and DD may not be able to attend.
I actually totally understand this - she should be there for her baby sister's birthday which is ultimately more meaningful in her life than the wedding of someone she hasn't even seen in at least a year. And we don't even know for sure yet I am seeing him in a couple of days and will get a final answer.
My friend is FREAKING OUT about potentially being "down a flower girl" on her big special day. I am so shocked. She was swearing at me and being a seriously huge b***h. I apologized at least 8 times because I do feel bad that I didn't realize a potential scheduling conflict until now.
If she was sad because DD couldn't be a part of her wedding because she really wanted her there, that would be one thing, but it really sounds like she is just pissed that her PPD might be 1% less like she pictured it.
She actually said "what the f*** could possibly be more important than my wedding???"
I am so upset
I feel like a jerk but I also feel like the only thing that matters to her is having us there as decorations and that makes me feel like she doesn't actually care about me or my daughter at all. Part of me doesn't even want to be in her wedding now.