Wedding Party Dilemma

teresakate

So.... I am stressing about the number of people in our wedding party.
I have 4 bridesmaids. 2 of which are my very best friends, and 2 are my 16 year old nieces. My fiance does not want 4 groomsmen. He has his brother and one of his best friends. Is this OK?
Our wedding is going to be mostly a DIY, casual, relaxed, outdoor wedding. Nothing really traditional.

kcscejal

1. Sides can be uneven.  No big deal.
2. I think they should be invited.  If the best friend is invited the girlfriend has to be.  Personally, my FI would not be best friends with someone who did not respect me.

ootmother2

That's quite a dilemma indeed

[Deleted User]

Ditto pp. The sides of the WP do not have to be even.

As far as the second issue is concerned, your FI needs to put this dude and his GF in their places and tell them they will not talk to you that way. Plain and simple.

LDYGTR13

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wedding-party-delima?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:bc85cea7-6fee-4ee8-8e8c-cc5555401421Post:9e755d57-65b4-4a75-9d7a-2e2c53a74c8c">Wedding Party delima</a>:
[QUOTE]So.... I am stressing about the number of people in our wedding party. I have 4 bridesmaids. 2 of which are my very best friends, and 2 are my 16 year old nices. My fiance does not want 4 groomsmen. He has his brother and one of his best fiends. My question is.... Do I need to drop 2? Does he neeed to buck up and pick 2 more, or are we fine the way it is? Our wedding is going to be mostly a DIY, casual, relaxed, outdoor wedding. Nothing reallt traditional. My 2nd question is this.... My fiance's "best friend" has no respect for me. He is with a girl,(not married, but 3 kids) and she does not like me. I feel uncomfortable around them, and they both have gone above and beyond in the rudeness area with me. Between mean emails, nasty Facebook posts and falt out lies, I can't stand the "best freinds" girl friend. What are our options here??
Posted by teresakate[/QUOTE]

Question 1: Do not "drop" bridesmaids. That would ruin friendships and family situations would probably suck after that. He doesn't need to "buck up" and find random guys. Uneven sides are okay. I had 'em and I have paperwork that says my marriage is still valid - YAY!

Question 2: You don't have an option other than to invite her with him. They're a social unit. If she hates you that much she might not even show and if she does show up, you'll be looking prettier than her - you're the bride - you win. But yeah, you don't really have "options" per se' ...you have what's right and what's wrong. Choose what's right =)

ETA: and yeah, this dude sounds like a douche. Why is your FI friends with him?

Snippylynn

Spellcheck.

[Deleted User]

You do not need even sides. If they're that important they should be in the bridal party, regardless.

teresakate

I'd like to delete the entire thing- but don't know how!

The Mel and Todd Show

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wedding-party-delima?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:bc85cea7-6fee-4ee8-8e8c-cc5555401421Post:3d9e3b80-b4cd-45e6-b533-748f1cf66a67">Re: Wedding Party Dilemma</a>:
[QUOTE]I'd like to delete the entire thing- but don't know how!
Posted by teresakate[/QUOTE]

You can't, and shouldn't, because another poster...ohfuckit, I'm bored with responding already. 

teresakate

Fuckit, I'm bored responding??? I am not sure I follow what that means.

The Mel and Todd Show

I began to explain that you shouldn't dd your post, for several reasons.
1) You've already been quoted, so there's no point. 
2) It's rude to the people who gave you advice.
3) Another poster could have a similar issue and benefit from reading your post.  When you DD it, that poster then has to create a new post and wait for new answers.

Then I decided, fvck it.  I don't feel like explaining all of that.  But see, I found it funny to point out that I had become bored, rather than hitting cancel on my post.  By leaving the beginning of my post and then actually typing out the thought process which lead me to stop, I created another post which was mildly mocking in intent.  However, it also played on my own faults--in this case, that I'm  too gd lazy to bother finishing a thought.  So, to summarize, I inferred that you wouldn't care to hear what I had to say, but I also pointed out that I wasn't helpful enough to provide you with the info in the first place.  Get it?  Please let me know if there's anything else which I can do to help. 

teresakate

^ Thanks for clearing that up.

I just didn't want people getting the wrong idea of the kind of man I am going to marry. I thought maybe I made him sound bad in the OP. Oh well.....


Thanks to all for the advice. I apologize for airing some dirty laundry (he he)