Hi folks! So I need some advice. I have a bridesmaid that I would like to remover from the party BUT include in the ceremony by playing flute in a quartet. I want to make the suggestion gently and I am just wondering if you have any advice how. Before you all tell me how much I suck, let me explain the situation. She and I have only been friends a little while before I got engaged and she kind of hinted in an awkward way one day that she be a bridesmaid. However, we aren't as close as I feel we should be. That's not the real reason though. She is an extremely stressful person and I know that she will make many of my special days frustrating. She gets loud and rude and such. Here's another interesting thing, which is why I'm not a bad person. I wouldn't even consider it, but she kind of mentioned the same idea (though somewhat awkwardly). I said that my man was only going to have 3 groomsmen and that I was trying to figure out what to do in the ceremony with all my ladies, and she said (and quite nicely) "oh, we'll I don't have to be one." I don't think I want her in the party (I have lost sleep over this) but I really want her to participate in a capacity with less power, so to speak. She is a brilliant flautist and I would like her to play (a lot) in my wedding. So now we know the story! There won't be angry feelings, but I don't know how to approach the conversation. Any ideas?