Reception and Ceremony at different locations?

kkarlene

We would like to have our ceremony on the beach at a local venue and them have the reception at a vineyard on the other side of town (about 20 minutes away). There will be about 2 hours between the events.
Should we provide some sort of transportation between the venues?

Is two hours to long in between?

Should we offer an extended cocktail type event after the reception to cut down on the time between events?

staceycaine

We are in the same situation, but the distance between is only 10-15 minutes, depending on traffic out of the park. It's only like 5 miles. I think 2 hours is too long, but for us, 30 minutes is too short.

Our ceremony will be at a very pretty formal garden, then the reception at a hotel. Because I know weddings always run late, I am thinking an hour between the two, especially because people can/will loiter around the gardens. 2 hours, though, would be too long. 

Our tentative timeline:

Wedding 4-4:30 (possibly 4:45)

Reception Cocktail Hour/apps 5:30-6:30

The rest of the reception: 6:30-10:30

The bar will be closed during dinner and at 10, I think. We're not sure about those logistics.

Having the cocktail hour, for us, at 5 (30-minute gap) was just too short, knowing that people wouldn't start leaving until 4:45 or 5. I felt like we'd be paying bartenders to sit and stare at walls. Guests can go to the reception--they don't have to sit around in another location if they don't want. We'll have cookies/candy/apps out already. But the bar won't open and the heavier apps won't start until 5:30. We'll probably arrive around 6.

bmoruzzi

Two hours in between is way too long of a gap.  Since it'll take 20 min to drive to the other location, I'd have your reception start 30 min after the end of the ceremony.  

redheadfsu

Gaps are really really rude.

Sometimes they are necessary/can't be helped as some churches only allow weddings at certain times (something still should be hosted but guests understand); however, since you can help it either move back the ceremony or move up the reception. Or host something during the ENTIRE gap. But since the gap is something you can help, get rid of the gap.

acaponi87

Are gaps annoying? Yes. But I don't think they are the end of the world. And I don't think that 2 hours is too much.

I actually went to a wedding in Grand Rapids that was exactly like what you are talking about. We went to a bar near the reception site for like an hour. Everything was fine. Just make sure your guests have a list of things to do/places to go (put it on your website or in the invites or something). 

kmmssg

The distance is no problem, the gap is a huge one.  Gaps are just rude.

MyUserName1

Distance is just fine, but the gap is too long.

If you hosted a cocktail hour-and-a-half before the reception, that would be ideal.

ElisabethJoanne

I agree with PPs. I'd also be baffled by 2 outdoor or outdoorsy venues. But that's just me and an anti-outdoor-wedding hobgoblen.

redheadfsu

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_reception-ceremony-different-locations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d23afc0d-2ff5-4379-8bca-a8107061a9b6Post:ef4d3bc4-9a2b-434f-93d0-1cff9de5d017">Re: Reception and Ceremony at different locations?</a>:
[QUOTE]Are gaps annoying? Yes. But I don't think they are the end of the world. And I don't think that 2 hours is too much. I actually went to a wedding in Grand Rapids that was exactly like what you are talking about. We went to a bar near the reception site for like an hour. Everything was fine. Just make sure your guests have a list of things to do/places to go (put it on your website or in the invites or something). 
Posted by acaponi87[/QUOTE]

But it sounds like OP can schedule this so there isn't a gap. So she is being rude just because. She is making guests sit around and stare at the clock, that is rude.

Yeah, I want to sit at Starbucks or a in smokey bar in formal clothes wasting my time and money...

NOLAbridealmost

I agree with PPs: a 20 minute drive is no biggie. A 2 hour gap sucks. I'd cut the gap. 

Simply Fated

I agree with pps. The distance isn't a huge deal, but what ate the guests supposed to do for an hour and a half?

sharp0099

I don't think you're being rude, rather you're asking for advice in order not to be rude to your guests.

Regarding transportation you don't have to provide this but if it's in your budget go for it. I've been to many weddings with the same distance between weddings and about 30% provided transportation.

 As for the gap, since it's only a 20 minute distance I would extend the cocktail period and have it start 30 minutes after the ceremony is suppose to end.  So if your ceremony is scheduled from 4:00 to 4:30, the cocktail period should start at 5:00.  Even though you extend the cocktail hour longer, you don't have to have food out the entire time, you can limit the food to an hour or so.  Some people also only have beer and wine available until after dinner. 

cebrady89

I don't think the gap is too long. People can figure out how to entertain themselves for an hour and a half, and if you provide names of local bars, things to do, etc. then you should not have a problem. 

I think the worst that would happen is some guests would skip the ceremony and come to the reception only.

Church/officiant restrictions often mean that a gap HAS to be there. My church only allows weddings at 1:00, but we want our guests to have a full meal, so the time of the reception has to be later (cocktails beginning at 4:30 in our case). My parents are allowing their friends and family to kill the time at their house in between if they want, and my fiance's family has offered the same to their portion of the guests. I don't see how this sort of arrangement is so offensive to people.

OP: the gap is fine. If you can provide transportation, do it. If you've set up a block of rooms at a hotel, see if they do any type of shuttle service for weddings - ours does, and it's free. I think you should NOT do an extended cocktail hour. Some guests would arrive promptly and then be stuck at a cocktail "hour" for longer than expected, waiting for the real reception to start.

sweetcanadian1979

The distance is fine. PP saying the gap is rude are not taking certain things into effect. Having the reception 30 minutes after the ceremony ends is impractical. I know at any wedding i have been to people spend upwards of 30 minutes chatting, especially for an outdoor wedding, so that would be minimum of an hour, honestly i would host a cocktail hour for 30-60 minutes at best, most won't even be there an hour before the reception.

kmmssg

Why is it the only people who endorse gaps are the one who HAVE to have a gap so they can have their evening reception?  Gaps are rude and guests should never have to entertain themselves between the two events because of poor planning.

CarleyBo

I am not at all fond of them (I picked a venue where the ceremony was literally a few feet from the reception so the guest could get their drink and eat on while we took pictures), however I recently went to a wedding and had a 2 hour gap and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would/could be.  If you're doing this, I would have a shuttle or some sort of transportation for the guest from their hotel (since this is most likely where they will go to wait) to the reception site and then back at the end of the night.  Hope it works out!

cindyn9178

As you can see above, many people will tell you that gaps are rude, but there are many people who see no problem with them - or at least, don't consider them rude. Annoying? Sometimes as a guest, yes.. but rude?

I personally don't find a gap rude.. sometimes it can be annoying, depending on who's wedding it is, if it a Friday or a Saturday, what time the ceremony starts, where the reception is, etc.. There are many factors contributing to how annoying I find it. It also depends on what your family and friends are used.
In my area and circle, gaps are pretty customary - for many reasons, so I don't really think that anybody in my family or circle would find it rude at all. As a PP said, the worst that happens is someone doesn't come to the ceremony and just goes to the reception. I personally don't mind that - because the only person who matters to me at the ceremony is the groom, so as long as he's there, we can still get married

That being said, we had a Friday wedding. Our ceremony was in a Catholic church and the latest ceremony they would allow was 3pm. We didn't have a full mass, so the ceremony was over by 3:30. We then had a quick receiving line, so most guests left the hotel no later than 4 pm.

Our cocktail hour began at 7pm, and it was about a 45 minute drive away from the church. We chose this time for multiple reasons - but mostly because we wanted to avoid any problems our guests might have in attending an EARLIER cocktail hour on a Friday evening. If we had the cocktail hour start at 5, probably 3/4 of our guests would've missed it, due to work, traffic, etc. We knew that many guests wouldn't be at the church - and we were totally ok with that - but it didn't seem that anybody was inconvenienced with attending the 7pm cocktail hour start time.

We did not provide transportation for anybody except the bridal party. We had a block of rooms reserved at a nearby hotel, with a free shuttle to the reception, so the out of town guests that were staying there drove to the hotel to check in after the ceremony, and then took the shuttle to the reception. The other local guests either went home, or went to a family member's house to kill some time. A few guests showed up about 30 minutes early for the cocktail hour - but that was fine, because the venue was prepared for that and opened the bar 30 minutes early just in case.

Overall, if you want to/need to have a gap, do it., as long as you don't mind some guests skipping the ceremony. You know your guests the best.