Wedding Etiquette Forum

VIPs?

My FH and I decided on a really small WP.  I'm having my brother as "dude of honor" and he's having his best friend and college roomy as best man.  And that's the WP.  I have a few female friends that I'm close with, and I want to be my partners in crime at the bachelorette party, and probably sit at the table with the WP and their dates.  Is there a way to go about giving them some special title or special role that isn't "bridesmaid" since we don't want a whole bunch of people standing up for us?  I know these girls will understand that I picked my brother, but I want to make them some sort of VIP anyway.  Any advice?

Re: VIPs?

  • Nope.  Just let them be guests.  If you want to have them sit with you, that's fine.  They don't need a title for that.

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  • How about just wedding guest? Or maybe your friends?
  • I think if you start adding all of these special titles, you'll be heading off into wedding semantics crazy land. Either they're bridesmaids, or they're guests.

    That said, we are having a wedding party that we are designating simply as "wedding party" and not giving gendered titles to anyone. So perhaps I am the proverbial pot, and you are the kettle.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_vips?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:d26d08f1-dfc3-458f-a39c-de9f799e1412Post:4454fcdb-03ac-4df6-b9c3-c0ef4184f0e5">VIPs?</a>:
    [QUOTE]My FH and I decided on a really small WP.  I'm having my brother as "dude of honor" and he's having his best friend and college roomy as best man.  And that's the WP.  I have a few female friends that I'm close with, and I want to be my partners in crime at the bachelorette party, and probably sit at the table with the WP and their dates.  Is there a way to go about giving them some special title or special role that isn't "bridesmaid" since we don't want a whole bunch of people standing up for us?  I know these girls will understand that I picked my brother, but I want to make them some sort of VIP anyway.  Any advice?
    Posted by Storytime[/QUOTE]

    Giving them any title or anything besides making them a BM tells them I want you to feel special, but not enough that I will let it ruin the vision of my day.  Just have them as guests, and if you want them to sit at your table you can.
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  • I agree with guests.  Being able to share in your special day is an honor.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_vips?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d26d08f1-dfc3-458f-a39c-de9f799e1412Post:9c6e222a-18d2-497a-9eec-c8cbdf2cc6ac">Re: VIPs?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think if you start adding all of these special titles, you'll be heading off into wedding semantics crazy land. Either they're bridesmaids, or they're guests. T<strong>hat said, we are having a wedding party that we are designating simply as "wedding party" and not giving gendered titles to anyone. So perhaps I am the proverbial pot, and you are the kettle.</strong>
    Posted by sarah0725[/QUOTE]

    We pretty much did that. They called themselves "BM" or "GM" or "bridesman" though. And DH's side was pissed he didn't pick a "best man." Let's just say our friends were surprisingly way more into the whole traditional wedding deal than we were. (And only one of 6 IS married or anywhere close to it.) We listed them as "bride's attendants" and "groom's attendants".

    Anyway, people were invited to my bachelorette who weren't BMs. In the end, only my BMs came because it was a weekend away type deal, but your best friends can throw you parties or volunteer to help address invitations without getting a title or being listed in the program.
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