Thanks

breaness

Thanks to the one person who didn't jump to conclusions. Was not talking about more than one AHR but rather having a cookout or dinner.

ahhhitsshannyn

Is everyone that is invited to the AHRs invited to the wedding?

This is just my opinion since I kind of despise AHR's, but I think if you are going to go that route you should only have one party. Sometimes people can make it, sometimes they cannot, but that is the same with weddings. If people could not make it to the wedding would you have 3 weddings? If you want to cater to these people, than maybe you could have it in a more central location, but either way it is their choice to attend or not. There is no reason to have multiple "receptions" just because some people chose not to come.

hlq2011

I agree with PP entirely.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

I think you're thinking way too much. Have the DW. Invite who you need/want to invite. If most people can't make an AHR, don't worry about it. Don't turn this into a traveling wedding circus. Some people won't be able to come and that's okay. Next time you see them, they'll ask about the wedding. If you're close to anyone who can't make it, you can email or mail them some pictures.

AdeleDazeem

We're having an AHR for our wedding.  You're going to get strong opinions around here about them, though.

I think one AHR is plenty, however.

nurse.misty

I wouldn't have 3 different AHR's. You could still go visit the families and go to dinner or something more casual though. Just don't make it wedding related. Obviously they'll still ask and you can talk about it, but I wouldn't make it a full AHR and host 3 separate parties.

breaness

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dw-etiquette-questions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:d31226ed-7cc8-4c37-9dac-06eb038d7ccePost:7de6bc38-d680-4464-88c9-0a9ac6a8a687">Re: More DW etiquette questions</a>:
[QUOTE]I wouldn't have 3 different AHR's. You could still go visit the families and go to dinner or something more casual though. Just don't make it wedding related. Obviously they'll still ask and you can talk about it, but I wouldn't make it a full AHR and host 3 separate parties.
Posted by nurse.misty[/QUOTE]

This was more like what I meant. Going to visit them, maybe a cookout type thing but probably just dinner.

jessicabessica

Is it really worth it to have the AHR?  It sounds like your money could be better spent on a nice dinner or cocktail party for your local friends, and then you could try to feel out your PA and VT family to see if they would want to celebrate with you at a barbeque or whatever it would be.  I could see wanting to have something to include them especially if you and your FI don't know each other's families that well. 

My FI and I are trying to figure out if we're going to do a West Coast celebration (just a picnic in the park or something).  We invited everyone to the wedding, but I don't know how many can make it out for it.  We're going to kind of play it by ear after the wedding and see what they'd be up for. 

breaness

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dw-etiquette-questions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d31226ed-7cc8-4c37-9dac-06eb038d7ccePost:59b8d59d-d284-4e90-ac56-be34be9d369e">Re: More DW etiquette questions</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>Is it really worth it to have the AHR?</strong>  It sounds like your money could be better spent on a nice dinner or cocktail party for your local friends, and then you could try to feel out your PA and VT family to see if they would want to celebrate with you at a barbeque or whatever it would be.  I could see wanting to have something to include them especially if you and your FI don't know each other's families that well.  My FI and I are trying to figure out if we're going to do a West Coast celebration (just a picnic in the park or something).  We invited everyone to the wedding, but I don't know how many can make it out for it.  We're going to kind of play it by ear after the wedding and see what they'd be up for. 
Posted by jessicabessica[/QUOTE]

<div>Yeah, we're having 60 people, most of which are friends and we've already booked the venue and the entertainment. We're having a party with dueling pianos and it's going to be a lot of fun for a small party. </div><div>
</div><div>We go try to go to Vermont once a year anyway and PA a little more often. Whenever we go visit the majority of the family gets together in both places so I figured we could do it within a few months of the wedding when it's still 'new' and share our wedding video & pictures and stuff.</div><div>
</div><div>Not a gift-giving type thing, but rather a way to share it with people who care :)</div>