Changing out of bridesmaid dress?

CS1194

I'm a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding this weekend. Even after some alterations, my dress is a bit tight -- it zip and everything is technically in place, but ugh, it is not comfortable and the boning digs into me when I sit. (Yeah, I am one of those people who tried on the sample at David's Bridal and did not realize the sample size was totally stretched out... live and learn and order a size up next time.) 

Anyway, would it be crazy terrible of me to change into a more comfortable party dress after all the photos and ceremony are done? Something where I can actually breathe? I know as a bride, I would have been like 'Whatever works for you" and my friend is pretty laid back... but I just want to gauge what people's response would be if a bridesmaid asked them that. I wouldn't just go and change without checking with the bride, barring major dress-splitting disaster on the dance floor... (honestly, I do question this zipper's staying power.... totally getting some lavender thread just in case someone needs to be sewn into their dress day-of) I had already planned on bringing something to change into for the bar-hopping after-party just 'cause... Thoughts?

WildRumpus

If the bride was ok with it, I wouldn't have a problem with it.

pooh8402

if one of my BMs asked, I wouldn't care. I would rather they be comfortable. have you asked the bride?

Night_Sprite

I'd ask the bride or pop into David's Bridal to see if they have the dress in the right color a size up in the store.  It happens.

sucrets4

I usually get treated better by the bartender in a BM dress.  Just sayin'...

quotequeen

I would be a little sad if my BM asked me this because I would feel obligated to OK it but would honestly be bummed about it.

weddingbells2010

ditto to quotequeen.

andy71781

I think its fine!  If the pictures had been taken I would be totally ok with my BM changing. 

danieliza1127

I would have taken the dress to a seamstress and had it let out.  But if the wedding is this weekend, I guess it's too late for that now unless you can find someone who will do it for you in 24 hours. 

I think it's fine to ask the bride and explain why you want to change, but if I were the bride I would be annoyed that you didn't fix the problem before now. 

[Deleted User]

Ask the bride first. But yes, I would be a bit sad if my girls asked me to switch. There will still be picture taking and I want it to be their dresses we picked out.

When did the dress come in? Did you try it on as soon as it came in? Like danieliza1127 said, I would see if someone can alter it for you in a hurry, but if not, just learn for this experience should you be in any weddings down the road.

fallbride1109

My MOH/sister asked me this.  She wanted to change into a sparkly reallly short cocktail dress with spaghetti straps.  I didn't say no but she could tell I wasn't thrilled about the idea.  Luckily, once her dress was altered, she said it was fine.

Definitely ask her first.

goheels05

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_changing-out-of-bridesmaid-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d5ccac70-9a46-4a66-9dfe-e95a47880e91Post:fb644dd7-d593-42f1-8e06-0180391cc532">Re: Changing out of bridesmaid dress?</a>:
[QUOTE]I usually get treated better by the bartender in a BM dress.  Just sayin'...
Posted by sucrets4[/QUOTE]


Hmmm.  Good call.

I would be a bit annoyed, too.  If it fits well enough to wear in pictures, it fits well enough to suck it up for the rest of the reception, no?  It couldn't hurt to ask her, I suppose.  At least it's just another dress you want to wear; my SIL and BIL put on jeans and sweatshirts and are in the background of what would have been my favorite photo of us dancing. 

CS1194

Thanks everyone!

The dress HAS been let out and altered already. DB doesn't give you a lot of fabric in the seams, so it could only be let by an inch or two. Didn't have time to try on the dress the day I picked it up from the store (six months ago) which was my main mistake, because I would have never walked out of there with it if I had, but lesson learned. David's Bridal suck; I'm surely not the first person to make that observation. Tried it on maybe a week after I brought it home from the store, freaked out, I lost 7 pounds, but I think a few more would really help to make it fit in a comfortable way. I know six months is PLENTY of time to lose more than 7 pounds. But. I failed. This wasn't vanity sizing here; the one I tried on in the store truly seemed like the right size at the time. (Incidentally, another of the bridesmaids confessed to me she'd had the same issue, although she's been living abroad and so couldn't pick hers up until a few weeks ago so I feel like hers is a more valid reason. But same result.)  ANYWAY, six weeks ago, I called DB to see if it would be possible to rush order a new dress in the next size up -- apparently this color is a special order color, so it takes 12 weeks to order no matter what, and they did not have it in stock in the color/size combination I wanted anywhere. 

Anyway, I haven't asked the bride yet because I didn't want to make her feel bad. I was trying to gauge what people's general responses would be. I understand that sometimes in life you have to be a little uncomfortable, but when your attire is causing you enough pain to prevent you from enjoying things? Eh. I have a "slimming body wrap" scheduled tomorrow morning that I am hoping will buy me a few inches so maybe that will help. Will probably bring a dress for the after party and make a game time call based on the bride's mood, my pain level, etc. Or there's always the possibility of have an "Oops!" wine spill moment. 

brookelynpaisley

I'd be a little annoyed that a BM hadn't taken care of the issue before now, as Danieliza said. But then, if pics have already been taken, who cares. There are bigger things to worry about that day than whether a bridesmaid stays in her dress after photos.

fangsiting

One of my friends got pregnant after the dresses had been ordered.  Amazingly, she squeezed into a size 4 dress at 5 months along for pictures (I hate her for that).  However, she changed into a different dress for the reception.  She asked me if that was OK, but obviously I said I didn't mind.  As long as you are changing into an appropriate dress and not jeans or PJs, I don't see the problem.  It's pretty much impossible to have fun when you are wearing clothes that are too small for you.